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I don't know what to do

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Tpmcg002

Well-Known Member
#1
Part if my mental illness relapse is having distorted thoughts. I see that and counter them but they get stronger and harder to shut out. Then my others start making more noise and want us to end this life. Today I called my T and told her we are in trouble and then agreed to go to the hospital but when we think of going we feel incredibly exhausted so could not drive. My group agreed to not taking action for tonight so we are safe but we see out t tomorrow. She will ask what the plan is and we can't tell her. We have to have that option. I don't know how to keep that secret and maintain safety. What would you do?
 

Tpmcg002

Well-Known Member
#2
What am I going to do? I can't tell the plan...my group won't go along with that. They...we have to have the option. That is not good I know but it us where I am.
 
#3
Sorry to hear that you are going through this.

Maybe you can tell your therapist that you had a plan, but refuse to tell her what the plan is.

In time, maybe you would change your mind and tell the therapist about the plan.
 

BarryW

Well-Known Member
#4
Hello tpmcg,
Your therapist cannot force you to share anything you don't want to. You can go and talk with her about other topics and just not answer that one. You could tell her that if she forces you to share your 'plan', you will spend more time thinking of another one, instead of potentially spending that time thinking positively. Perhaps in your own way, having a 'plan' makes you feel safe. If that is the case, try explaining it, maybe she will understand. Hope your appointment goes well.
 

Tpmcg002

Well-Known Member
#5
Sorry to hear that you are going through this.

Maybe you can tell your therapist that you had a plan, but refuse to tell her what the plan is.

In time, maybe you would change your mind and tell the therapist about the plan.
I have told her that much and she insisted that I go to the hospital. But they sent me home with instructions to go to a outpatient program starting the next day. I overslept today and have since decided to not go.
I don't see how doing it again will help much and then go home and have to be with my plan the next 18 hours. Better than nothing ....maybe but I choose to not go that far away or spend the money. Worried that I am wrong though.
 

BarryW

Well-Known Member
#6
Take time and think things over carefully. Sometimes you gotta spend money on yourself to take care of yourself. Don't hold back on treatment if you need it -- once you are ready.
 

Tpmcg002

Well-Known Member
#7
I know that I need help. I feel like my distorted thoughts are worse or maybe it is really a sign of improvement and they it means that I am noticing now more than I was. Who knows. I feel though that I am doing it wrong but right eludes me. A friend thinks that this will bite me in the butt. Nice support except I know that she thinks that will motivate me to listen to my T. Thanks for your insight and support. I am so glad that people write back!
 
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