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i dont want to be suicidal

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by kroque93, Oct 11, 2012.

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  1. kroque93

    kroque93 Member

    i mean really what is the point of bothering sometimes though? People in the industry that i love are so competitive and ignore you if you are socially withdrawn (though i try really hard not to be and i go outside as much as i can). hell there are no jobs as it is though and i haven't had one in a long time.

    then there's the fact that people slight you and think you're a bitch automatically if you are a girl, i'm no bitch people don't give me a moment

    i am really behind in networking and i haven't found an internship or a job, hell i put it off and just teach myself as much as i can... my family doesn't realize i exist and they dont care
    i know i am depressing but welp
    honestly no matter how much i try its never enough
    its honestly amazing i can be hopeful and keep going most of the time .. just looking at all the things you did is nice
    but its never enough nothing is
    if i went home now i think i would give up
    but i really have to go home, i cant live here anymore

    i would have to live in my hoarder mother's house again
    her house is disgusting and was the source of meltdowns for me as a child
    i think that would be the tipping point
    i cant do anything else and i don't know what to do
    but really who gives a shit seriously, nobody
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope things turn around for you soon hun It take time to get a career it really does and lots of work getting it. Don't give up ok it will happen hugs
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