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I get it now

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by kreative1, Jan 28, 2013.

  1. kreative1

    kreative1 Well-Known Member

    Here it is folks, an live tobacco induced scotch soaked epiphany, yep over an decade I finally had an epiphany, who was it that said “ the pen is an vulnerability instrument, when the sane write they become insane” I’ve accepted the fact that I’ve been selfish, why the hell do I want to end it, hell why do I want do hurt everyone’s feeling, their egos, their self-doubt if I end it, I mean better live in mental, physical spiritual pain than have people saying why did he end it, ohh the hurt, the shame, the selfish prick, why ohh why I I I I yep I’ve accepted that me life is what it is, lifeless, soulless ugly, painful existence, but hey I’m here to live for the physic vampires and the users, at least I understand me existence, I’m here for everyone else, use me, abuse me, suck my energy dry, so what is I’m 37, live at home with a psychotic mother, same low paid job that has me serving customers and owner with my head down and ass up, I here for the people, to give my unconditional self and have it molested yes rather continue this painful existence than ending it, acceptance people, it the first stage to recovery, and the amplification of pain skyrockets more, but its worth it for the people and consumerism being alive, but at least on me headstone it’ll say “selfless, there for everyone, what a guy, what a life” :ignore: