I did one thread I explained a little bit my situation with him. I’m feeling very negative right now so I might be too much. I’ve been having crisis and splitting for days everyday I feel like my brain is literally breaking down more and more. Almost like I’m losing my neurons I don’t even know how to describe it, it’s like I’m dissociating so much I don’t feel anything almost.
to summarize, I basically left my abusive family to live with a man in another countryIt’s been 3 or 2 years now and I’m telling you I didn’t do that because I loved him, I just wanted to save myself. I don’t regret it but at the same time I regret the fact that my family wasn’t good enough to be able to make me safe and stay. Because if my family was safe I would have never have left my country.
And the worst thing is that this man wasn’t stable with his papers so I’m stuck. He apparently is working on it and that’s why I can’t even leave him. He’s confortable, for him everything is working great and I’m telling him I’m feeling worse I hate our relationship I want to leave but nobody listened or took me seriously. Neither his mom, him, the landlord….
by the way the landlord evicted us of the appartment bc of screams (mine) and violence. But we found another better apartment but I didn’t have the choice to move with him.
And you know what he told me? Because I have a friend that married a guy and he’s learning his language by himself bc you know it’s normal and my bf said after 3 years that for him it’s useless for him to learn my language “there’s no point” “we have technology” “ I’m brainwashed by social media” and he said he loves me (so funny) and that he shows me his act of love is different.
Well… I have to beg him so he organizes a dinner or we spend time together but no instead this man is going out with his friend he met a few days ago and they go camping together. And he dares me that when he proposes something I always refuses or that I never organize something.
unfortunately for him I’m fucking unstable mentally and have crisis and explode (bpd) bc I come from a very traumatic family.
For me you must me so fucking weird and selfish to take advantage of a girl who was so so vulnerable mentally and tell her she can come here, she’s “safe” but you don’t even have your papers and you think love would fix me. In fact, it made me worse bitch.
to summarize, I basically left my abusive family to live with a man in another countryIt’s been 3 or 2 years now and I’m telling you I didn’t do that because I loved him, I just wanted to save myself. I don’t regret it but at the same time I regret the fact that my family wasn’t good enough to be able to make me safe and stay. Because if my family was safe I would have never have left my country.
And the worst thing is that this man wasn’t stable with his papers so I’m stuck. He apparently is working on it and that’s why I can’t even leave him. He’s confortable, for him everything is working great and I’m telling him I’m feeling worse I hate our relationship I want to leave but nobody listened or took me seriously. Neither his mom, him, the landlord….
by the way the landlord evicted us of the appartment bc of screams (mine) and violence. But we found another better apartment but I didn’t have the choice to move with him.
And you know what he told me? Because I have a friend that married a guy and he’s learning his language by himself bc you know it’s normal and my bf said after 3 years that for him it’s useless for him to learn my language “there’s no point” “we have technology” “ I’m brainwashed by social media” and he said he loves me (so funny) and that he shows me his act of love is different.
Well… I have to beg him so he organizes a dinner or we spend time together but no instead this man is going out with his friend he met a few days ago and they go camping together. And he dares me that when he proposes something I always refuses or that I never organize something.
unfortunately for him I’m fucking unstable mentally and have crisis and explode (bpd) bc I come from a very traumatic family.
For me you must me so fucking weird and selfish to take advantage of a girl who was so so vulnerable mentally and tell her she can come here, she’s “safe” but you don’t even have your papers and you think love would fix me. In fact, it made me worse bitch.
