I just don't think anybody understands how badly I want to bring my brother back. my best friend, my rock, my #1, my hero, my motivation & my happiness, gone. each day gets harder and harder without you here. the hardest part is that you chose this. you chose to leave me. you chose to take your life. the things I saw when I found you, I won't ever be able to forget. I can't get them out of my head & I still have terrible nightmares. I love you so much and it's getting harder and harder to go on without you. I'm trying, I really am, but I'm getting exhausted. I can't fight through this forever.. will it ever get easier? I can't handle these flashbacks, I need my brother back. now.