For the past few months I've been planning to leave. Leave everything, my apartment, my jobs, everything. Everything is in order, my landlord knows I'm "moving", I've sold almost everything, and what I didn't sell or keep I've given away. My friends think I'm coming back, I really hated lying to them about that, one of them wanted me to promise that I'm coming back but I couldn't. So she suspects I'm leaving to find some place to die, and she's right. I've come to accept that I don't belong here and it doesn't bother me too much anymore. I still have my computer obviously, but soon I'm going to sell it too. I'm not going to post much for a while, and soon not at all. It's all a matter of when I decide to leave. When I tell the few people I have told about this, they tend to try talking me out of this, but I'm not going to let anything stop me this time. I thought I would be worried about doing this, but now it's like going home after you've just busted your ass at work and just want to get home to rest. But before I die there's a few things I need to do before then, and they all take place in different states, thus the "little road trip". First, I'm going back to the town I used to live in to visit the graves of a few friends there (there's quite a few). Second, I'm going to a town north of where I am and telling someone some things I needed to say that couldn't before this. And last, I going to vist my fathers grave in Seattle. After that, I don't really care. It kinda feels better to share. I can't wait to start.