i'm so depressed and i dont know what to do

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#1
i'm so depressed. i dont' know what to do. i just feel so down ALL the time. i don't even know why i'm so depressed, i just am. every day of my life i have to struggle with myself just to hold back the tears, which really isn't hard for me, cause i never cry. for some reason i just can't cry. it's impossible for me. i've just been so hurt in my life and now because of that i've turned so cold, and i can't really get close to anyone. i sarted getting close to one of my guy friends, and actually fell in love with him. he is the only person that i have ever really cared about. we're going out right now and it's been almost 7 weeks, but i just can't love him anymore. i'm just so cold, and i can't feel anything for him, or anyone anymore. it use to be so easy to love him, but now he just makes it so hard. he's also very severly depressed and i think also suicidal. i worry about him every single day, not knowing what he's going to do, or if he's stil gonna be alive the next day. recently, he tried overdosing on his seizure pills. i'm always so terrified that he's gonna kill himself, and i won't be able to handle it. and he has SO MANY problems. i just don't know what to do with him. i'm always stressing over him, and our relationship is just causing me so much pain and confusion. sometimes i think that it would be better if i just broke it off with him, but the problem is, i just love him to much. well guys, i'm sorry for writting so much. i didn't mean to. there is alot more to tell, but i've just ran out of time
 

Scum

Well-Known Member
#2
Don't ever be sorry for writing or posting.

You don't mention in your post about whether or not you have seen your doctor, whether you see a therapist, or have any professional support. I suggest you go to your doctor (even if you have been before) and take a print out of your post so that he can see what is going on for you. There is a lot they can do to help.

With regards to your friend, remember that whatever happens is not your fault. It can be very stressful worrying about someone who is suicidal. Have you tried to talk to him about how you feel?
 
#3
Don't ever be sorry for writing or posting.

You don't mention in your post about whether or not you have seen your doctor, whether you see a therapist, or have any professional support. I suggest you go to your doctor (even if you have been before) and take a print out of your post so that he can see what is going on for you. There is a lot they can do to help.

With regards to your friend, remember that whatever happens is not your fault. It can be very stressful worrying about someone who is suicidal. Have you tried to talk to him about how you feel?
yeah i do see a therapist, but it doesn't seem to be helping. alot of the times, i skip my appointments, because i always feel as though i need to be strong enough to deal with my problems on my own.

no, i haven't told him about how i feel. it's just hard for me to talk about my problems with other people, you know?god, i'm about ready to cry right now. i'm just so tired of keeping all my pain locked inside, and not being able to tell my boyfriend my feelings because i don't want to burden him with them. he has his own problems. i don't think he has any idea how much i care for him
 

Allo..

Well-Known Member
#4
:hug: firstly.. You said something about not being able to love him anymore, without thinking you siad you did love him, so remember that.

I strongly recomend you going to your therapist appointments because they can really help you and your right, you do need to let things out. Does your therapist know about your boyfriends? i expect so but if not thats something you should Definatly talk about.

Goodluck hun, Take care.

Allo _%
 
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