H'mm... Might you be able to try one out (an in-person one that is) just if even on a temporary, or "trial," sort of way?
I "think," it can make a big difference for both parties, given all of the cues that are 'lost in the mix,' so to speak w/online.
However, that said; it can also be quite beneficial too. One of my best friends who has multiple graduate degrees, and so maybe
this speaks more to her level of perfectionism, I don't know (how rare it is); but she went through something like 10 therapists,
before finally settling on one she was comfortable with. She saw them weekly throughout graduate school. And said she would not
have made it w/o them: because, or as "Therapy was a place for me (her) to go & express all of my thoughts & troubles, and to not
have to be judged (as she would no doubt be - by anybody else whom she'd shared such thoughts w/in her life; of which, I doubt there
were many. . .) / So while that may be one extreme, and isolated case. I have heard many others say that it took them a few tries, or people
as in therapists, to "get-it-right." It's all about finding the right pairing, or match; & to see if you have that 'chemistry,' which can admittedly,
be a little elusive to find. So what I might try to seek, were I ever in a position to attain one again, is to find one in which I did not share the
opposite, or bad kind of chemistry with. If that makes sense? Here's where they can help you out, provided that they are good, and you are
willing to give them a fair shot or shake, and so on. They can help to assess your situation, and to address your problems not only from an
outsider's perspective (which is very important, and very good) but they can also help you to develop ways in which may counter some of your
faults, or flaws, in either your behavior patterns, or just in your thinking process, and thoughts themselves. They have skills and training to help
facilitate & achieve this. The best ones will do so with a surgical degree. The experienced ones will look at you like a walk in the park, and I mean
that in a good way. The way your heart surgeon will look you in the eye and remove all doubts before going under the knife, because they are
so abundantly, almost "over-confidant," in a way - in their skills & that they're not going to lose you or have an unsuccessful procedure. No, not
on their watch. Which is what you want. Someone who can listen to you. Offer feedback. Ask the right questions, prompting further investigation
on both ends. All of this is minimized, or more difficult to do, in my opinion, when put through the filter of an online communication. Where the
two of you are not in the same room together, breathing the same air that is circulation around, and et cetera/et cetera. But that is just one person's
POV. Now, another thing that I seem to have now forgotten from just a moment before. It was on the psychologist (not psychiatrist). Shat, I can't
remember. If I do, I'll chime back in. They're there to help translate your problems and your issues through you. To give you the tools necessary to
achieve breaking through the walls, or over the sometimes many hurdles & obstacles that sometimes our life has presented us, or others that have
been put or placed there at our own doing. Either way it is a shared relationship that is based upon mutual respect. It is one that grows. Maybe you've
got this great hairstylist. And you go to see her every month, or whatever it is. And as much as you're looking forward to the new do. It is as much about
updating her on your new happenings & whatnot in your life, and to see & engage with her--again, maintain and nurture (just sort of automatically here, if you like her), that relationship--so that it can foster only promising things in the future and going ahead will therefore be hopefully, a bit more prosperous
than it is now. Which is why you're seeking help in therapy in the first place. It is just like physical therapy. In that, it should hurt. If you get in there and deal
with any significant sort of dilemmas or traumas - such as that or those which you may have faced which then led to you being in here. If those topics come up, and you know, things can get pretty heavy then - if you trust them. And think that they are doing a good job. So afterwards, it should only stand to reason that, you will most likely feel like crap for a little while afterwards. Hopefully, eventually over time this will even out & lessen. And then you can begin to feel the benefits of having some of this weight relieved or from having it been lifted if it has been indeed burdening your soul. Or something to such effect~ / The good ones will do this. At times, so too, will the bad ones (because they don't know what they're doing, how to control you, or the situation from getting/or going out of control, or over-board/as in knowing when to say when, or when it is about to go over the cliff & therefore become dangerous...) so the good ones will know how to navigate this landscape fairly well. And to hopefully, therefore, then: to be able to keep you safe. I'd recommend stating and being up front, in so far as you can, and you are capable, what kinds of concerns you have in advance of a session. Sort of like giving them some guidelines or boundaries on where you are and how things stand in terms of what you're comfortable with sharing and discussing and how you can handle certain stressful areas or what ever the case may be. Hopefully, I haven't rambled on for so long, that I have talked you ear off. Maybe come back & read this in small, or smaller 'chunks?' Or no, don't even bother reading it at all! that would be just fine for me, and whatever helps you best, is what's most important to me. If it does not work for you, then that is ok too. Some people, it clicks with, others it does not. But you just don't know until you've tried. And put a heartfelt/or genuine honest effort into it. If you go in there & say, I bet this won't work. Well, as they say, "Whether you think I can - or I can't... either way, you're probably right!" ;D
I'm just thinking that would it be more helpful for me to go to an actual therapist and make it a routine?
