I hear it often but I find it hard to believe. I'm very protective of my space, headspace and body. I can't imagine giving full access to these things to someone who is simply convenient, nice or because I have to. I only fall in love with someone if I recognize them as someone who shares the way I see the world and experience life. I don't get "opposites attract". I've been in love 2 times if you exclude trauma based bonding or crushes which were based on a pure fantasy. If you include them then it would be like 6.
Recently my friend found a new date and they both visited me. This friend used to be interested in me but I wasn't in them. They claimed to relate to me but I didn't feel understood. When they found this new date I thought it's a replacement of me because we have a similar appearance and some aspects of history. I wondered if their personality is similar to mine but it isn't. I saw no chemistry between them. They constantly had opposing opinions. I didn't see between them what I see as the basis of a relationship for myself. I didn't see them share kinship or deep understanding. They were just people who are more or less comfortable with each other.
I've heard a lot of times that love is simply about being comfortable with each other. But the idea of dedicating my life to someone who is just good enough feels suffocating. Is it too much to ask to want a relationship only with someone who really gets you? With most people I feel like a ghost. I feel like I need to translate myself, explain myself, like they never understand where I'm coming from, why I have certain reactions and why generic normie advice doesn't work for me in a lot of cases. It's frustrating.
Recently my friend found a new date and they both visited me. This friend used to be interested in me but I wasn't in them. They claimed to relate to me but I didn't feel understood. When they found this new date I thought it's a replacement of me because we have a similar appearance and some aspects of history. I wondered if their personality is similar to mine but it isn't. I saw no chemistry between them. They constantly had opposing opinions. I didn't see between them what I see as the basis of a relationship for myself. I didn't see them share kinship or deep understanding. They were just people who are more or less comfortable with each other.
I've heard a lot of times that love is simply about being comfortable with each other. But the idea of dedicating my life to someone who is just good enough feels suffocating. Is it too much to ask to want a relationship only with someone who really gets you? With most people I feel like a ghost. I feel like I need to translate myself, explain myself, like they never understand where I'm coming from, why I have certain reactions and why generic normie advice doesn't work for me in a lot of cases. It's frustrating.
