its been probably 8 or 9 months since I last had to post on here but it would seem that depression never goes away. I finally got to my first command. i lasted here all of 6 months before I requested to go to mental health. I set up an appointment with a psych. my first appointment I thought went well. I am pretty sure he thinks I am an alcoholic. everything relates back to alcohol. I can't say anything about suicide or else I could get put on the "no carry" list or medical sep. I would rather not have either one of those. my appointments are spread out so far (a month wait for each appointment) so its not helping at all. I had to reschedule once because of drills my command was doing that I was unable to miss. it will have been two months since my last appointment. this is insane. I cant wait 2-3 months in between appnts. i am not an alcoholic, I have strict rules for myself when drinking and if i drink given my depression, and I am not comfortable around my psych. when the psych wears his uniform it is not very inviting. If i want to see a psych out in town I have to pay for it out of pocket. I cant be happy about anything. I can give you a list of my goals and my accomplishments but nothign seems to make me happy. I am losing my lust for life. nothing excites me anymore. its all become the same.