It's about 5 months that I'm obsessed to a married man.

[Lonelyheart200]

He's 14 years old older than me. He's got wife and kids.
I think he knows that I like him. But he acts kind with me most of the times. I don't see him much. I used to see him once a week for about an hour. He's my professor.
I can't stop thinking about him most of the days. It's so wrong and I feel really guilty.

 

[alice202]

Lonelyheart

This is not an unusual situation. Its often the case that men who are more mature seem a lot more attractive than men who are the same age.
There is a big difference between fantasy and reality. I think the fantasy can help you sort out what you're really looking for in a mate. If you find someone who is available and has those qualities, then the crush has served a purpose.

I don't need to tell you that getting involved with a married man can cause a world of hurt, and could result in him losing his employment. You don't need to feel guilty about feeling attracted to him. Your private thoughts are your own. It may be hard to stop thinking about him until you no longer see him at all or you are thinking of someone new. And finding someone who is actually available to think about would be even better for you.

I wish you the best.
Alice

 

[Lonelyheart200]

Lonelyheart

This is not an unusual situation. Its often the case that men who are more mature seem a lot more attractive than men who are the same age.
There is a big difference between fantasy and reality. I think the fantasy can help you sort out what you're really looking for in a mate. If you find someone who is available and has those qualities, then the crush has served a purpose.

I don't need to tell you that getting involved with a married man can cause a world of hurt, and could result in him losing his employment. You don't need to feel guilty about feeling attracted to him. Your private thoughts are your own. It may be hard to stop thinking about him until you no longer see him at all or you are thinking of someone new. And finding someone who is actually available to think about would be even better for you.

I wish you the best.
Alice

I totally agree with you.

 

[snails]

Not your fault. The power is with him and he knows better. I'd bet you're not the first. It would turn me right off someone who would do that to their family but I appreciate your feelings. I sincerely hope you won't hurt yourself over him

 

[Innocent Forever]

There is nothing wrong with liking your professor.
The obsessing part can hurt you cuz it can take over your life.
Liking and crushing on him is okay.
What does obsessing about him give to you?

 

[Lonelyheart200]

Not your fault. The power is with him and he knows better. I'd bet you're not the first. It would turn me right off someone who would do that to their family but I appreciate your feelings. I sincerely hope you won't hurt yourself over him

Me too. I hate married men who are not loyal.

 

[Shinzon1]

I think moralizing stuff like this is wildly unhelpful, but on the other hand it is worth a deep rhink as as far as motivations or like deep seated emotions.

The Freudian interpretation would probably sit somewhere regarding daddy issues. I being that up as to say that what your feeling is valid but you really need to unpack youself a bit.

 

[Lonelyheart200]

I think moralizing stuff like this is wildly unhelpful, but on the other hand it is worth a deep rhink as as far as motivations or like deep seated emotions.

The Freudian interpretation would probably sit somewhere regarding daddy issues. I being that up as to say that what your feeling is valid but you really need to unpack youself a bit.

I do have a very abusive father.