It's been rough.

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by Luscarion, Mar 12, 2013.

  1. Luscarion

    Luscarion Member

    I guess this will be my official initial post. I've had many run-ins with suicide. It's exceptionally hard to describe the pain you go through knowing a loved one took their own life. I've experienced this pain multiple times, one of which happened just over a year ago. A couple of the victims were people with whom I have been romantically involved. One I wanted to marry. Another still was a coworker and friend. Another was my grandfather, though with the sheer amount of physical pain he was going through from cancer, it could be understandable.

    I've had thoughts regarding it. Some days much, much worse than others. There are days, though, that can go by without a thought like that popping into my head. I ultimately decide not to do it due to not wanting to hurt my friends and family. I ensure they do not know I still have these thoughts, though. I do not wish to needlessly worry them.

    So, it's been rough. Rough really doesn't even begin to describe it. I'm sure if a Hell existed, I could probably consider it a vacation. Maybe give the devil in charge some pointers...

    Humor definitely helps keep me going, whether it be wry, witty, dry, dark, or slapstick. If I find it funny, it helps.

    That being said, I also want to state that even though I am not the best person out there to help people, I've decided that I will try my damnedest to ensure I can help as many people as possible. I will be here if you need someone to talk with. I will be here if you need to vent. I will be here if you need someone to pick you up. If you have nowhere to turn, I will be here. I cannot promise you the ultimate words of wisdom, but I CAN promise you my friendship.

    All you need to do is reach out to me. I am here.

  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi Armando i too have suffered loss from suicide and it is what has kept me from doing same i cannot do that to my family so i know how hard it is to fight the demons sometimes.
    Just know if you need support we are here as well for you ok hugs