It's done

[Broken21]

I'm trying to break up with him, because now it's a love/hate relationship. We met back in November talked for like a month and a half... he knew everything that went on with me. He helped me out of it... my sadness and thoughts.

He has told me before that he is dark and that he will hurt me. We got into a massive fight on 25th of Dec... my fault. We distanced apart. It was easy then. To go away from him and not talk to him. We makes different lifestyle choices then me.. but then a month ago he confessed his love to me and I melted. Every ounce of anger I had gone.. it was like a movie.

I feel now it was selfish for him to say it. Though I love him too, I wish that we would've had the bitter tension until his schedule died down. Busy with school, busy with work, busy with getting high.

Being well aware that I am clingy I told him this long ago. This is why I don't date, have boyfriends, or have hardly any friends. Because I can become a leach.


Which is what is happening... yet I ask him if I am getting on his nerves. He says no. So I'll message him. No replies, ever so I get worse and message more, all good things...

I am convinced all love fails.. my hope is out the window... what am I going to do now? Annoy him to the point that he actually blocks me? I feel pathetic, having know idea how to handle this...

 

[AlexiMarie7]

Hi there,

People love in many different ways, but I've found that like any other "gift", it is best to love people in the way that they most appreciate it. Sometimes this means that we do have to fight our own natural way which could be "smothering" a bit.

If he says you are not getting on his nerves, I think you could take that at face value, but you can try to lessen the messages, if it helps you or before it gets to that point, if that's what you are thinking.
Messaging someone else, or yourself instead may help. Or having an ongoing "draft" email where you can send some of the messages may help.
Perhaps you can start by trying to resist sending even one of the many messages.

No matter how wonderful love is and feels, it is healthy to still have your own life. Do you have much free time in contrast to him? Are there any activities you can get into to occupy you for a bit?