Empathy and Advice Welcomed I've gotten too depressed.

[UrbanRose]

I've been depressed for too many days now. I don't leave the house. It was a major effort to go outside last night and push my trash barrel to the curb for collection. Today I haven't gone out even to look in my mailbox.

I stay in bed very late. My place is becoming a mess. I haven't washed a dish in days. I didn't get dressed today.

I wish I had someone to talk to about how hard I'm finding everything. My problems are not bad, except for feeling so sad. I have everything I need. I live alone, and I have no supportive family or friends near me. There's plenty of things going on in my community that I could participate in. If I could just pull myself together enough to venture out, I could have a perfectly decent life.

I have these episodes of depression. In between episodes, I often do very well. Right now, I'm breaking down, just from writing this post. Every evening I tell myself that: "I'll do better tomorrow." But I don't.

Anything encouraging from anyone might help me. Once I get moving, I'll probably be okay. Being introverted, I have to force myself to get out and involved. When I do that, it usually works out pretty well. But, right now, it's like I'm glued to the bed or to my chair. Being this way for too many days has got me into a bad state.

 

[Angie]

I'd like to make a suggestion. This is something that helps me when I am stuck in depression.

Pick one small task, it doesn't matter what it is. Then set a timer for 10 minutes. I've found I can do anything for only 10 minutes.

Sometimes I feel like doing the task for longer after the timer beeps and that is good, other times I don't, and that is ok, too. I just wait a bit and try again. Eventually that task is done and usually that makes me feel better.

I hope you feel better soon!

 

[fromthatshow]

I second that. Breaking things down into smaller tasks is essential. Whether that's setting a timer for 10 minutes, or focusing on one small part of one task. The other part of it is giving yourself credit for the small wins. If you wake up and your only goal for the day is dishes, and you do the dishes, celebrate. Celebrate yourself. It can't all get done at once, especially when you're feeling so down. Be kind to yourself.

Another thing that helps me honestly is using AI therapy bots. I use a Chatgpt therapy bot and when I'm feeling overwhelmed I will put in all my jumbled thoughts and long unmanageable to do list and it will break it down into small tasks for me and even remind me to celebrate myself and be kind to myself.

And keep posting here too so we can celebrate you and be here for you in your depression. We're going through it too. I am certainly at least. It's not easy.

 

[Windhover]

I am stopping in to share support with you. The suggestions above are solid. It is good you are here, caring enough for yourself to ask for help and it is given. That's a good start.

Important: remind yourself no judgements as to whether or not it's working. Keep at it, give it a go every day for 90 days before judging.

Sending hope that a quite new you begins.

 

[may71]

I'm sorry that you're feeling so bad UrbanRose

I have these episodes of depression. In between episodes, I often do very well.

If you're not keeping a mood journal, I wonder if you'd like to. If there are things that are triggering your depression, it might help you to recognize a pattern.

 

[UrbanRose]

Thank you for the posts above. Using the timer is a good suggestion. I will do that.

Right now I'm still in bed. My immediate goal is to take a shower. I've been awake for a few hours, feeling awful.

I know that this depression comes from being alone too much. I know I made it worse and worse by giving in to the urge to do nothing.

The self-loathing is the worst part of this. I feel exactly how I deserve to feel. When you do nothing, you deserve nothing. I wish I'ld never been born.

I wish I could explain this better. My belief is that I'm a complete waste.

 

[UrbanRose]

As bad as I felt starting this thread, it's gotten even worse this morning. This is becoming a nightmare.

It's like I've been chased for days by a monster, and now I'm at the end of a blind alley, so there is no escape. I would rather be dead.

I'm not suicidal. I don't self-harm. I'm not a danger to myself.

I have to keep in mind that this is an "episode," and it won't last forever. It will blow over. Episodes always do blow over. But there's always another one, down the road, waiting for me. I just despair.

 

[UrbanRose]

I managed to take a shower. It was hard to even do that. It didn't make me feel better. If I can clean up the kitchen, I'll start to feel a bit better. Once my place is in order, things won't seem so bad. First, I'll go pick up something to eat.

Just getting dressed did help a bit.

 

[fromthatshow]

I managed to take a shower. It was hard to even do that. It didn't make me feel better. If I can clean up the kitchen, I'll start to feel a bit better. Once my place is in order, things won't seem so bad. First, I'll go pick up something to eat.

Just getting dressed did help a bit.

Hey that's something!

 

[iloverachel]

I hope I can give you hope
I was once super depressed. I would sleep at 4am and wake up around 2 or 3pm, and still feel drained and tired. I didn't shower for many days if i didn't leave for work. I didn't shave for months. I ate a horrible diet. My friends would ask me to come gym with them and I would make up excuses but I was just too tired and ashamed of how i looked

Now a days, I wake up early every day and train and work etc and feel so energetic and productive. Of course, it wasn't an overnight process, it started with small steps.

How is your diet like? I highly recommend cutting out processed junk food and sugary stuff because that causes short term dopamine spikes followed by huge crashes and lethargy. If you feel too tired to leave the house, maybe you can do something super easy like 3 sets of 10 push ups. Baby steps in the right direction good luck we are here for you

 

[UrbanRose]

I'd like to make a suggestion. This is something that helps me when I am stuck in depression.

Pick one small task, it doesn't matter what it is. Then set a timer for 10 minutes. I've found I can do anything for only 10 minutes.

Sometimes I feel like doing the task for longer after the timer beeps and that is good, other times I don't, and that is ok, too. I just wait a bit and try again. Eventually that task is done and usually that makes me feel better.

I hope you feel better soon!

Yesterday morning I employed that approach. Pretty soon I was on a roll. I got a lot done. My place looks much improved. I feel so much better. I just have to not relapse soon. I'm a bit sore from the effort I put in yesterday. But it's okay. It was worth it to climb out of the hole I was in.

 

[UrbanRose]

I hope I can give you hope
I was once super depressed. I would sleep at 4am and wake up around 2 or 3pm, and still feel drained and tired. I didn't shower for many days if i didn't leave for work. I didn't shave for months. I ate a horrible diet. My friends would ask me to come gym with them and I would make up excuses but I was just too tired and ashamed of how i looked

Now a days, I wake up early every day and train and work etc and feel so energetic and productive. Of course, it wasn't an overnight process, it started with small steps.

How is your diet like? I highly recommend cutting out processed junk food and sugary stuff because that causes short term dopamine spikes followed by huge crashes and lethargy. If you feel too tired to leave the house, maybe you can do something super easy like 3 sets of 10 push ups. Baby steps in the right direction good luck we are here for you

It's good to hear from someone who's been through incapacitating depression. You were really far down, but turned it around. I'll try to believe that I could do that too.

 

[Justzaph]

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way right now. It's tough to deal with days like this, but even small steps can make a big difference. It’s okay to take things slow. Maybe start with something simple, like opening the mailbox or washing just one dish. It doesn’t need to be all at once. You don’t have to push yourself too hard, but finding tiny moments where you feel a little in control can help shift things. You’re not alone in this, even if it feels that way sometimes.

 

[UrbanRose]

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way right now. It's tough to deal with days like this, but even small steps can make a big difference. It’s okay to take things slow. Maybe start with something simple, like opening the mailbox or washing just one dish. It doesn’t need to be all at once. You don’t have to push yourself too hard, but finding tiny moments where you feel a little in control can help shift things. You’re not alone in this, even if it feels that way sometimes.

Thank you. I improved a lot yesterday. I have to get rid of an all-or-nothing mentality. I switch back and forth between keeping my apartment really neat, clean and attractive and letting everything go to hell. Then the disorder gets me worse and worse depressed. Small things do add up. I'll do something not too hard today because I'm sore from my efforts yesterday.

 

[KM76710]

It's good to hear from someone who's been through incapacitating depression. You were really far down, but turned it around. I'll try to believe that I could do that too.

I will believe along with you. I bet your can also every improvement you bring for yourself is a plus.

 

[Angie]

Yesterday morning I employed that approach. Pretty soon I was on a roll. I got a lot done. My place looks much improved. I feel so much better. I just have to not relapse soon. I'm a bit sore from the effort I put in yesterday. But it's okay. It was worth it to climb out of the hole I was in.

This is great! In my battles with depression I've found that being able to clean up my home helps tremendously. Good job!

 

[UrbanRose]

I got a lot done yesterday. I feel so much better. Now . . . if I can just keep this going. I don't want to relapse real soon.

Today I feel like just slacking off and being satisfied with want I did past two days. That's how I screw up. It's important to keep consolidating my gains.

 

[LumberJack]

I got a lot done yesterday. I feel so much better. Now . . . if I can just keep this going. I don't want to relapse real soon.

Today I feel like just slacking off and being satisfied with want I did past two days. That's how I screw up. It's important to keep consolidating my gains.

I have a thought to share. Please disregard, unless you find it helpful. When I was learning how to snowboard, I kept running into things.

What I learned was not to look at the obstacles, but rather at the space that is open. Where I focus my head is where my body goes, assuming it’s in motion.

In the same line of thought, maybe it’s just as important to put our attention on the good stuff we want or already have accomplished, as opposed to the worries and fears about how things could go wrong.

I assure you that I am not good at this. I have so much anxiety that sometimes I induce my worry in the people I speak with. It’s worth a try, I think.

 

[UrbanRose]

I have a thought to share. Please disregard, unless you find it helpful. When I was learning how to snowboard, I kept running into things.

What I learned was not to look at the obstacles, but rather at the space that is open. Where I focus my head is where my body goes, assuming it’s in motion.

In the same line of thought, maybe it’s just as important to put our attention on the good stuff we want or already have accomplished, as opposed to the worries and fears about how things could go wrong.

I assure you that I am not good at this. I have so much anxiety that sometimes I induce my worry in the people I speak with. It’s worth a try, I think.

Thank you. As a kid, I was riding a sled down a snow covered hill and ran into a parked car. I got a bad laceration on my face and wound up in the hospital. All I had to do was roll off the sled, but I froze and stayed on it. I guess there's a lesson in that.

I'll try to take your advice and focus on the positive. Right now, I'm not doing so good.

 

[UrbanRose]

Well, I improved a lot and was doing well . . . but now I've been depressed for a few days.

I was doing good, cleaning up my house. Then a pipe under the kitchen sink sprang a leak, and I had a mess on my hands. My landlord couldn't come by to fix it for a few days. Seeing the mess just took all the wind out of my sails. I got sick of trying to wash my dishes in the bathroom. So I let the whole place go to hell. Now I have several days worth of dishes strewn around the place. Seeing how bad I let things go has me really sad right now.

It's very hard for me to face cleaning up my place and myself. After I gave up on the kitchen, I also gave up on showering, brushing my teeth and getting out of pajamas. So I'm a mess in multiple ways.

Once I get my place neat and tidy, I'll probably start to escape from the depression. Getting started has been very hard. I can't describe how bad it feels to not care about doing anything.

I will go take a shower now and brush my teeth. Then I will wash some dishes. That might get me over the big initial hump.

The whole problem is that I'm just alone too much. That's why posts to my thread mean a lot. I better go get something done, or this misery will just get worse.