I'm anxious about living in this world and my life is absolutely horrendous and has been for over a decade. I'm housebound and physically ill and have no help. The doctors originally diagnosed me with psycosomatic disorder. I was and am very breathless if I move so that stops me getting out. As I have been misdiagnosed I am getting no help. No assistance apart from blood pressure tablets. I have asked for help but none is coming and because I'm an anxious sort I can't keep asking for help when none is coming. I have no skills in living my life purely in this flat and never leaving it. You need skills that I don't have. I did have a kinda boyfriend who helped me with practical stuff but he was extremely abusive off drink and that has made me worse. I cut loose from him recently as I couldn't stand the abuse but now I'm left in this flat with no help or assistance. I had to learn how to use a computer to get food and provisions. I am desperate to die as I need to live a normal life or not at all. I am very lonely and feel the state has abandoned me. You might wonder why the doctors don't help, well, I don't know. I've told them I've been unable to leave the house in 11 years but no help is coming although they did say they would send someone up here but no one has come. I had a community Psychiatric nurse come here about 8 years ago but that did not help my condition at all as I was physically diabled but this was ignored. I need something good to happen as I've had enough of isolation, lack of sun and sheer and utter despair. I'm over 60 but unfortunately there seem no chance of me dying in the near future which absolutely horrifies me. I want to be gone as I have no one and there is no hope for me. I'm so frightened.