I am now almost up to 200 pounds. Yes. 200 pounds. I weighed myself today. Why? Because I quit smoking. But I can't use that as an excuse any longer. Its because I can't eat. Gaining weight from not eating? Yes - because every time I put most food into my lips I get panic attacks. I get the anxiety attacks before it even goes in. So I have only a limited amount of things I can eat - and those are milk products (for the most part) and carbs. I can eat toast/bread, pudding (tapioca only!), ice cream (french vanilla only!), milk, yogurt (vanilla only!), fish crackers (only the white ones!), and .. of all things, hot dogs. Oh, and the Frostys from Wendy's. That's it. Everything else makes me freak out. So, I quit smoking, replaced it with eating (yay me!) and can only eat the above items without having panic. I had to replace vitamins with Ensure (because I can't swallow pills!) so I get enough of what I need. I drink two a day (that's 500 calories right there), so I get a grand total of 50% of the vitamins I need daily. I hate this fucking disorder! I fucking hate it! I can't even take the bloody dog for a walk in the morning without anxiety attacks, and I've gotten so out of shape! I hate myself. I really fucking hate myself. :bash: /rant.