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know what I should be doing but just don't want to

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by tonyldn, Apr 26, 2013.

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  1. tonyldn

    tonyldn New Member


    I've had problems with depression in the past and am still on anti-depressants but stopped seeing my psychologist a while ago. I know some of the things that trigger my depression, and I know what I do when I'm depressed and what I'm supposed to do. Last night the guy I've been seeing for the last few weeks (I know, not exactly a long term relationship) said he didn't want to see me anymore - rejection is my biggest trigger for depression. So, I feel miserable and have been up most of the night with suicidal ideation (I'm not suicidal though). When I'm like this I don't want to see or talk to anyone. I know that isolating myself will only make me worse, so why is it so hard to actually *not* do it? I have plans to meet friends lined up, but the way I feel right now I know I won't go, I'll just come home and feel like crap on my own instead. I really hate feeling this way but looking at my behaviour it's like I don't want to stop feeling this way :(

    Anyone else get this? What do you do about it?

  2. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    Anyone else get this? Yes me and many more. Dealing with it? Forcing myself to have safe, limited contact helps. Just that is exhausting but isolating is a very dangerous downward spiral. If you can limit the isolation it's easier to come out of it.
  3. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    Sometimes people feel like being horribly sad and depressed is right. There are times it is appropriate - grieving a loss it is an acceptable normal response. The issue comes when people decide that it is the easiest place to be... that it is better to stay there than come out and risk feeling it again or it is inevitable to feel it again so just stay there.... When you get to that point it is a matter of willpower and discipline to force yourself to action - to change something even small to begin to break out of it.

    A common expression "s/he isn't happy unless s/he is miserable" offends a lot of depressed people but there is some truth to it as many others as neutral observers can see that they seem to do many things to keep themselves in that state (isolating, drugs, alcohol, quitting jobs or hobbies relationships). A person decides it is safer or simply easier to stay in that place than put effort into other and when they do put effort in they do it "knowing" it will not work so regardless of result - no surprise it does not work.

    You are in the fortunate position of seeing and knowing what you are doing and simply need to focus energy on changing minor decisions each day until you break out... knowing is a huge advantage.
  4. srilu

    srilu Member

    Yeah it happened to me.when I failed my exam,I felt suicidal.
    My friends were with me then but I stayed isolated all that night crying.
    Then I left my hostel without telling anyone to my home town.
    After staying there for a week with my parents,I felt relieved and happy.
    Then everything became normal after that.
    So,I suggest you to have a change with environment and spend time with your loved ones.
    Time will heal everything.
    Be strong
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