Laugh Faktory

[Atreides]

gaslighting (noun) - the act of farting and trying to convince someone else they did it

 

[KM76710]

gaslighting (noun) - the act of farting and trying to convince someone else they did it

I just try to claim it was the: cat, dog, chair, a fly buzzing about.

 

[Atreides]

classic novel (noun phrase) - a book that someone praises but never reads

 

[Atreides]

My girlfriend made fun of my color blindness. I see that as a huge gray flag.

 

[DowntheRabbitHole]

 

[Gonz]

I just try to claim it was the: cat, dog, chair, a fly buzzing about.

I claim it, even if someone else did it.

 

[KM76710]

 

[DowntheRabbitHole]

 

[Atreides]

My friend told me his cousin was a Ninja...


I said "can he throw one of those stars made of metal?"
He said "Shuriken".

 

[Atreides]

 

[DowntheRabbitHole]

 

[Atreides]

Two guys were robbing a liquor store.


The first guy points at a bottle and says to the other guy “Hey, is this whiskey?”
The other guy turns to him and says “Yeah, but it’s not as whiskey as Wobbing a bank”

 

[Atreides]

I just thought this one up

I just found out my infection has become viral. Everybody on the internet is talking about it.

 

[Atreides]

A ship carrying blue paint collided with a ship carrying red paint


50 sailors were marooned

 

[Atreides]

I named my phone "Titanic".


Now it syncs every night.

 

[Atreides]

Your password must have at least 8 characters. And one of those characters must have a tragic backstory.

 

[Atreides]

The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit walk into a bar
https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/?f=flair_name%3A%22Walks%20into%20a%20bar%22

The Bartender says, “Is this one tab or three?” They reply, “Yes.”

 

[Atreides]

I went to McDonald's and ate a happy meal. The kid's parents were real pissed.

 

[KM76710]

 

[Atreides]

I needed to get some old paint off a table, my dad said he’ll get some stripper in the morning


I have no idea how she’s going to get the paint off