Life is a scam (I’m feeling very alone)

[TheDevilsRival]

I feel no one truly cares about me but at this point it almost doesn’t matter no more.

I don’t want to live, I truly don’t. I’m a very ambitious person, I have many passions, I’m working on my goals yet I know for a fact that deep inside of me I don’t want to live. I would drop everything for death. Trade my ambitions for death. I just hate being here, I hate this feeling when I wake up in the morning, I just wish I would never wake up. I don’t even want to hurt myself anymore I just really want to end it. Maybe if a person would care about me and tell me something like I’m special or important or something that I shouldn’t give up, maybe that would make me think a bit because I feel so so so lonely.

I remember when I was in my country I saw this psychiatrist who mentioned something that realized was really true. I have a family that is very lonely, I am extremely lonely. Not only a feeling but also a fact. I am currently living in another country with no family around, just a bf that I hate. My cousins and aunts/oncles are in different part of the world we don’t speak the same language we don’t have the same culture (because of war and immigration) and yeah I’m just very very isolated and alone. I don’t have close friends, I feel everyone is waiting for my downfall or something or watch me on social media but don’t support me while I intent to be big but struggle.

everyday I’m wondering what can make me unique so I try different things, have different talents yet I feel like everyone is better than me, I compare myself to those famous people and think why am I not famous like them? Maybe I wanted to be famous because I wanted to feel less isolated but i realized that I will forever because idk I just can’t being with people I guess…

I hate life, I really do. For me they said it’s a gift because the chances that we exist are very narrow but yet for me it’s just a scam to be here. It’s a robbery. And I would even say it’s an everyday life rape because we pay for everything. Not only with money, we pay with our energy our time, our feelings, everything to stay alive, to be “deserving of living” how does that make any sense? We are born without consent and we have to pay for it.

no thank you I’m out of that bullshit I want to disappear.

 

[may71]

I'm sorry that you're feeling so bad and that you're so lonely.

Maybe if a person would care about me and tell me something like I’m special or important or something that I shouldn’t give up, maybe that would make me think a bit because I feel so so so lonely.

You have inherent worth as a human being. I don't know you well enough to know what qualities you have in comparison to other people, but you don't have to have qualities that are better than other people to have worth or to find a life worth living.

You have confidence in your own talents, so you know that in principle there's a non-suicide way out if you could find a way to express those talents.

You probably need some kind of change in your life in order to feel happier, but you'd just have to find out what that change is.

yet I feel like everyone is better than me, I compare myself to those famous people and think why am I not famous like them?

Famous people are famous partly because of their talents and hard work, but also things like connections and luck. Often times they are willing to sacrifice relationships and personal privacy to advance their careers. A famous person isn't necessarily better than you in any way. Only relatively few people become famous, but it still might be possible for you to achieve that too if you want to make that your main goal in life.

You don't have to be famous to have a life worth living, and it could be that you'd be happier not being famous.

 

[may71]

Sending hugs if you would like hugs