My depression

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by sadhart, Oct 10, 2014.

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  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I don't come on this section often, but bear with me. As of today, I am seven months sober from alcohol. I suppose that is a good thing, but I don't really feel that great. The main reason is because some of the things in my life, still hurt. Things like my past...especially the painful memories from the past. I got rejected five years ago from a girl and the thought of wanting to take a chance again is painful. I wasn't good enough for her and I don't know if I am good enough for anyone else.

    No matter what I do, like say volunteer, for example, I just feel more emptiness than fulfillment if that makes sense. I mean, I guess I feel somewhat okay about helping others, but I still feel alone and in pain. I really don't remember the last time I truly felt happy if at all. I try to smile when I am doing somehting 9ex: like today at the bank) but it's hard.

    There is more, but this is the best I can explain this. The reason why i brought up my sobriety is because drinking helped numb the pain. And NO , I AM NOT one who believes in medication. I'm sorry for getting on the defensive like that, and I'm sorry if this didn't make sense.
     
  2. W Miller

    W Miller Well-Known Member

    Firstly, congrats on being 7 months sober, and you should be proud. Never turn back my friend. It numbs the pain, but only leaves us in worse shape in the end. I'm not quite there yet but I will get there.

    I'm sorry things are not going so well, and your past is coming back to haunt you, creeps up when you least expect it.

    Try not to allow yourself to think because you were rejected by this girl, that you are somehow unworthy of love again. Its all too easy to start to think this way. Sometimes, I often wonder what I did so wrong, and then it hits me; nothing at all.

    I wish I had better advice to offer you, but no expert by any means.

    Good luck, and again, congratulations on you sobriety.

    Best Wishes.
     
  3. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to say what you did. And though I don't know where you're at in your sobriety, just know that you are where you're supposed to be at this time. Hope that made sense.
     
  4. W Miller

    W Miller Well-Known Member

    You're welcome friend.

    Yes what you wrote makes perfect sense, and I know I'll get sober, because I'm determined. Thank you kindly for your encouragement, I've never had it put that way, and that is a healthy way to understand addiction.

    Thank you again :)
     
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