My life is ending tomorrow...

[White Dove]

Well my life is ending tomorrow..

Sorry everyone , but i just cant stand this pain anymore...

went to the dang ER and tried to get in to see them to get pain meds but was refused.. WHAT A BUNCH OF BULL THEY ARE... last time i was there i had burnt my hand ( AT WORK ) And now i cant see a Doc or anything until i pay at least 200$... THEY ARE SO FULL OF IT , I TELL YOU.. ALL THEYT CARE ABOUT IS MONEY.... I AM SO SICK OF THEM , OF THIS LIFE , OF EVERYTHING..

So i go to church in the morning , then i am gone... no waiting , no bull , no nothing.. I cant do this anymore.. i just cant... The pain is to much.. its just too much...

I havre tried.. i honestly have tried to stay and fight but i cant do it alone..

MY FAMILY DONT GIVE A DAMN.. THE DALTONS SURE AS HELL DONT GIVE A DAMN , NO ONE DOES.. THINK I WONT DO IT???? WELL YOUD BETTER TURN AROUND AND THINK THAT ONE OVER MY DEAR FRIENDS AND SO CALLED LOVED ONES, CAUSE I AM GONE TOMORROW...

I WILL NOT LET ANYTHING INTERFER THIS TIME..NOTHING ..

SO MR AND MRS DALTON , TAKE YOUR PRETEND LOVE AND SHOVE IT ... MY FAMILY CAN TAKE THEIR PRETEND LOVE AND SHOVE IT... CAUSE TOMORROW I AM GONE FOR GOOD... NOT BACKING DOWN AND NOT CHICKENING OUT... NOT THIS TIME...

 

[Painttheskyred]

YEP

sounds like a lot of shit there!!!! I was just talking to someone on msn and he just convinced me into joining the army , the way i see is it i want to die but i may as well die fighining , i know the medical system in the usa is all fucked up !! Im suprised americains dont come here to the uk , NHS its all free .......

As for you pain i can see where your coming from you just want to brust out and say to everyone , I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE , but the only way you can make people see that is if you kill yourself , well i can say i dont know the answer to that , try and sympathize with yourself listen to some music , have a few beers , try and relax , tis what im doing now , just chilling thinking about how the hell im going to get through 28 weeks of training , just take this feelings in your stride , i was just on the brink , untill i saw this thread , you got to be strong , if you aint what the hell am i fighting for , if you can give up so easly maybe everyone else should , sure stick to middle fingers up to the world and say piss off , im doing it right now hun , and will do it untill the day i die!!!

Be strong!!! fight the system and fight for your LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[White Dove]

YEP

sounds like a lot of shit there!!!! I was just talking to someone on msn and he just convinced me into joining the army , the way i see is it i want to die but i may as well die fighining , i know the medical system in the usa is all fucked up !! Im suprised americains dont come here to the uk , NHS its all free .......

As for you pain i can see where your coming from you just want to brust out and say to everyone , I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE , but the only way you can make people see that is if you kill yourself , well i can say i dont know the answer to that , try and sympathize with yourself listen to some music , have a few beers , try and relax , tis what im doing now , just chilling thinking about how the hell im going to get through 28 weeks of training , just take this feelings in your stride , i was just on the brink , untill i saw this thread , you got to be strong , if you aint what the hell am i fighting for , if you can give up so easly maybe everyone else should , sure stick to middle fingers up to the world and say piss off , im doing it right now hun , and will do it untill the day i die!!!

Be strong!!! fight the system and fight for your LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!

cant sorry...

i am doing it this time for good and for real.. no screwing around for me... got nothing to live for anyway..so im gone..

no more fighting.. I GIVE UP...

 

[Esmeralda]

cant sorry...

i am doing it this time for good and for real.. no screwing around for me... got nothing to live for anyway..so im gone..

no more fighting.. I GIVE UP...

stop wd! I and another friend have contacted the Catholic parish in your area and they should be contacting you soon! If they do not (if they thing we were pranking them or something, then PM me for the number and you can talk to them directly...but I know they will be contacting you very soon once there is someone in the office. Please hang on hun..I know the Datons contacted you...why not call them back and see? Why not talk to your family about your problems? You have nothing here to lose so make the most of it! And what about the Cancer center? They contacted you! Call them and you can hopefully get free meds and treatment!

You are worth more than this, Susan...son't end it like this! :hug:

 

[roro]

its the pain talking, you need to get your pain under control! I was in pain a couple weeks ago, and it made me suicidal.

as soon as I went up on my pain meds, i felt a little better.

there has to be somewhere you can go with no insurance, a pain clinic, the pharm companies have vouchers they give out for people with no insurance to get pain meds.

here is a good site i found http://www.intractablepaindisease.com/

or do a search on "intractable pain" or "chronic pain" and there are lists of pain centers in your area

 

[White Dove]

stop wd! I and another friend have contacted the Catholic parish in your area and they should be contacting you soon! If they do not (if they thing we were pranking them or something, then PM me for the number and you can talk to them directly...but I know they will be contacting you very soon once there is someone in the office. Please hang on hun..I know the Datons contacted you...why not call them back and see? Why not talk to your family about your problems? You have nothing here to lose so make the most of it! And what about the Cancer center? They contacted you! Call them and you can hopefully get free meds and treatment!

You are worth more than this, Susan...son't end it like this! :hug:

The Daltons contacted me???

WELL IF THEY DID THEY DIDNT LEAVE A MESSAGE UPON MY ANSWERING MACHINE...

YES , THE CANCER CENTER CONTACTED ME AND THEY CALLED ME YESTERDAY I THINK.. cause they got my medical records i suppose , etc.. but its not gonna do me any good cause i am dying anyhow.. i am screwed out of this life no matter what.. I AM FREEKING DYING AND I HAVE HAD IT WITH LIFE..

And on second thought i am not going to church today.. what is the point in it??? im freeking going today anyhow so it doesnt make a difference at all... i cant sleep cause this stupid pain is too much tonight so i got me a beer to help me sleep tonight and it starting to feel numb again.. at least the beer helps me to feel numb.. it helps ease this stupid pain.. nope not going to church... wont do any good anyway...

HECK THEY DONT CARE ANYWAY.. THERE JUST LIKE THE DALTONS, THEY DONT CARE FOR THE PEOPLE.. THERE IN IT FOR THE MONEY ONLY.. I CAN ALMOST GUARENTEE YOU THAT IF I STAY AWAY FROM CHURCH THEY WOULD NOT CALL TO SEE WHY I WASNT THERE.. NOPE THEY DONT CARE , NEVER DID.. TRIED THAT WITH LANTANA , THEY NEVER CALLED AND I WAS AWAY FOR 6 MONTHS CAUSE MY DANG CAR HAD TORN UP, NOPE CHURCHES OR THE PEOPLE WHO GO TO THEM DO NOT CARE... BEEN THERE , DONE THAT , KNOW FROM EXPERIENCE.. AND THE ONE I GO TO NOW , OR RATHER BEEN GOING TO , I HAD STAYED AWAY FOR ABOUT 6 MONTHS DUE TO THE SAME THING , BUT GOT NOTHING FROM THEM , NO LETTERS , NO CARDS , NO PHONE CALLS.. I AM NOTHING TO THEM. SO SEE IT DOESNT MATTER ANYHOW..... I COULD DIE RIGHT NOW AND NO ONE WOULD FIND ME FOR A LONG TIME CAUSE THEY WOULD NOT CHECK UP ON ME, CAUSE I AM NOTHING, YOU CANT TELL ME THIS ANY DIFFERENTLY CAUSE I HAVE EXPERIENCED IT ALL. THEY DONT CARE , NEVER DID.. I AM NOTHING BUT A WORTHLESS PIECE OF CRAP. THATS ALL I AM. I AM NOTHING TO THEM , TO THE DALTONS , TO MY OWN FAMILY , ETC..

So i am not going to church today.. gonna get drunk right now , ease the pain , take a few and go to sleep , then im up and off to the sunset to do it... im tired of this life, tired of the pain, cant fight both of them, just cant.. im gone, sorry...

 

[borderlinejustfine]

The Daltons contacted me???

WELL IF THEY DID THEY DIDNT LEAVE A MESSAGE UPON MY ANSWERING MACHINE...

YES , THE CANCER CENTER CONTACTED ME AND THEY CALLED ME YESTERDAY I THINK.. cause they got my medical records i suppose , etc.. but its not gonna do me any good cause i am dying anyhow.. i am screwed out of this life no matter what.. I AM FREEKING DYING AND I HAVE HAD IT WITH LIFE..

And on second thought i am not going to church today.. what is the point in it??? im freeking going today anyhow so it doesnt make a difference at all... i cant sleep cause this stupid pain is too much tonight so i got me a beer to help me sleep tonight and it starting to feel numb again.. at least the beer helps me to feel numb.. it helps ease this stupid pain.. nope not going to church... wont do any good anyway...

HECK THEY DONT CARE ANYWAY.. THERE JUST LIKE THE DALTONS, THEY DONT CARE FOR THE PEOPLE.. THERE IN IT FOR THE MONEY ONLY.. I CAN ALMOST GUARENTEE YOU THAT IF I STAY AWAY FROM CHURCH THEY WOULD NOT CALL TO SEE WHY I WASNT THERE.. NOPE THEY DONT CARE , NEVER DID.. TRIED THAT WITH LANTANA , THEY NEVER CALLED AND I WAS AWAY FOR 6 MONTHS CAUSE MY DANG CAR HAD TORN UP, NOPE CHURCHES OR THE PEOPLE WHO GO TO THEM DO NOT CARE... BEEN THERE , DONE THAT , KNOW FROM EXPERIENCE.. AND THE ONE I GO TO NOW , OR RATHER BEEN GOING TO , I HAD STAYED AWAY FOR ABOUT 6 MONTHS DUE TO THE SAME THING , BUT GOT NOTHING FROM THEM , NO LETTERS , NO CARDS , NO PHONE CALLS.. I AM NOTHING TO THEM. SO SEE IT DOESNT MATTER ANYHOW..... I COULD DIE RIGHT NOW AND NO ONE WOULD FIND ME FOR A LONG TIME CAUSE THEY WOULD NOT CHECK UP ON ME, CAUSE I AM NOTHING, YOU CANT TELL ME THIS ANY DIFFERENTLY CAUSE I HAVE EXPERIENCED IT ALL. THEY DONT CARE , NEVER DID.. I AM NOTHING BUT A WORTHLESS PIECE OF CRAP. THATS ALL I AM. I AM NOTHING TO THEM , TO THE DALTONS , TO MY OWN FAMILY , ETC..

So i am not going to church today.. gonna get drunk right now , ease the pain , take a few and go to sleep , then im up and off to the sunset to do it... im tired of this life, tired of the pain, cant fight both of them, just cant.. im gone, sorry...

plase don't

 

[ace]

WD,please wait sweety don't do nothing yet please I beg you what If the Dalton's did call please wait you never know your friend alway's Ace.