Hiya. :hug: I am so sorry to hear about your losses, especially the recent loss of your brother. Please do not blame yourself. When a person suicides, it is a choice that the individual person makes - and no one else is to blame. With the death of a loved one, grief and regrets are a common response. "I should have [fill in the blank] more" is very common. With suicide, a person chooses their actions because their own pain seemed too great and they don't/can't see any way to avert their pain. It was NOT your fault.
You are blessed with a son still. Perhaps in a while you and your son could have a "memory day" when you go through the family photo albums and remember times with your brother.
In the meantime, there are people here who have also lost a loved one to suicide and I'm sure that you will find support. Post as often as you want to get your story and feelings out. Sending you a hug and caring thoughts.