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my mom

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by Dawn72, Sep 22, 2013.

  1. Dawn72

    Dawn72 Member

    My mom passed away it will be 3 years in Jan. I still have not grieved for her is this normal? I am starting to a little bit but not like I should. I know everyone grieves differently but I would think by now I would of grieved some.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You may be still protecting yourself hun by shutting down any emotion When it is time you will stop being numb I am sorry for your loss hun
  3. pickwithaustin

    pickwithaustin Staff Alumni

    If you will indulge me..

    I lost my son what will be three years next month. I have grieved every second of every day but every person does this in a different way. My wife, she is just quiet and while I have caught her crying a few times, she does not say much about it. I, on the other hand, have done probably more in relation to grieving and toward his memory than 90% of the people in the world who lose a loved one. My two other son's do not let on a lot, especially my middle son - HOWEVER, I was cleaning his car the other day for him and I accidentally turned the car stereo on and the music that came blaring out was from the son (his brother) that we lost. The son I lost was a singer/songwriter/musician and has albums/CD's out. My middle boy never lets on, but by discovering that was what he plays when he drives alone, I realized that he is grieving and remembering/honoring.

    I would bet that in some ways, even your questioning your feelings toward grieving for your mom here, ARE in fact your way of grieving. I could be wrong, but as I said... everyone does this in their own way. Some people get angry, some get sad and cry like a baby. Others, they are stoic and may even appear uncaring. Inside their heart though, or in the deepest hidden parts of their subconscious, they are indeed grieving in their own ways.

    Don't let the way you may (or may not) be grieving be a weight upon you. Losing a child or a parent is a weight enough.
  4. torn23

    torn23 Member


    Your post here is a beautiful gift. To everyone. Thank you.
  5. the black raven

    the black raven Well-Known Member

    It's probably because your mind is trying to protect you from harm, by building a huge wall in it, so you won't feel as much emotion as you should really be. But deep inside, I'm sure you are grieving :/

    Sometimes, some emotion will leak, but when you're ready, the wall will fade, slowly, and it might hurt, but you should honor your mom and live your life to the fullest. I'm sure that's what she wants.

    Take care of yourself, and be well, for your mom too.
  6. Dawn72

    Dawn72 Member

    thank you for the replies neversunset thank you:)