Hi everyone,
I don’t have anyone to talk to about this but i figured I needed to get this out on this forum. I really think I have a mother that has signs and traits of narcissism. Here’s some context of the situation and life events that has occurred over the years and im on my wits end. I’ve been recently fed up with it and now recently been expressing due to built up rage over the years.
currently right now she’s upset at me and is throwing a fit. So I was making her coffee since she requested it and so she said I kept leaving the broom near the door so she complained that it’s in her way. So I told her I’m in the middle of making you coffee, can u wait? Keep in mind she pulled her back. Like can you hold for a second but she wanted me to stop in the middle of what I’m doing to move it for her. That’s when she blew up saying I’m yelling at her and talking back. As I’m quote on defending myself she starts saying “do you want me to open the window and let everyone know how this sounds like elder abuse?!” She then continues how I wouldn’t stop yelling at her. I probably displayed points of frustration cause she wanted the broom moved right then and there. Because of this she goes I DONT WANT YOUR DAMN COFFEE anymore and the fish sticks you make I don’t want that either! Then she proceeds to throw all the coffee I made down the drain and made it herself. She wanted me to apologize from the very beginning and I didn’t so she’s using that against me right now. I kept trying to convince her (which failed) that I wasn’t yelling that all I wanted was for her to let me finish making the coffee before I move the broom but then she started laughing and saying Well you won’t have to worry cause I’m never asking you to make anything for me ever again.
other instances includes
I made dinner and everything and so the kitchen was a bit of a mess and I guess some of the stuff was in front of the coffee machine (crucial detail to remember when I explain this later) and so I served everyone food first before me. As soon as I serve my portion I sit down to eat. I’m not even half way done with my food and my mom finishes hers first and then goes to kitchen and starts complaining how everything is all over and so she starts picking up everything and complaining over and over how I can’t clean right. I told her let me finish eating my food and I’ll clean up but no that answer wasn’t appropriate. She really was hinting at me to go clean up without a regard to if I finished eating. And after I finished I still had to clean and she goes after all the work I spent cleaning make me coffee and so inside I was pissed so I told her let me finished putting the dishes away and cleaning up what’s on the counter and she goes FORGET IT and starts sighing and makes it herself. then she starts blaming me and getting a worked up saying how she’s done picking up after me.
Remember I cooked! Served everyone before myself and then still had to clean the pots, pans, table, and wipe down counters.
Another recent incident was on her bday I wasn’t feeling well at all. I was cramping had a massive headache all day and so we had a reservation for dinner. She blames me how I didn’t plan time to pick up the cake cause I barely made it back home in time.
she blew up at me and said I hurt her feelings cause I said
If I felt better I would have allocated time and planned it better and she goes correct her statement and I said yeah if I felt better I really would have made time to do everything much earlier.
There’s other instances where I can’t even defend myself and if I do I’m extremely controlling and disrespectful. She goes you want the last word? All the time. Then she says well this won’t happen for much longer cause I’ll be 6 feet under! she either starts crying, throwing things Across the floor. If I don’t do what I’m asked at that second she goes does it herself and starts making a huge thing out of it.
I don’t have anyone to talk to about this but i figured I needed to get this out on this forum. I really think I have a mother that has signs and traits of narcissism. Here’s some context of the situation and life events that has occurred over the years and im on my wits end. I’ve been recently fed up with it and now recently been expressing due to built up rage over the years.
currently right now she’s upset at me and is throwing a fit. So I was making her coffee since she requested it and so she said I kept leaving the broom near the door so she complained that it’s in her way. So I told her I’m in the middle of making you coffee, can u wait? Keep in mind she pulled her back. Like can you hold for a second but she wanted me to stop in the middle of what I’m doing to move it for her. That’s when she blew up saying I’m yelling at her and talking back. As I’m quote on defending myself she starts saying “do you want me to open the window and let everyone know how this sounds like elder abuse?!” She then continues how I wouldn’t stop yelling at her. I probably displayed points of frustration cause she wanted the broom moved right then and there. Because of this she goes I DONT WANT YOUR DAMN COFFEE anymore and the fish sticks you make I don’t want that either! Then she proceeds to throw all the coffee I made down the drain and made it herself. She wanted me to apologize from the very beginning and I didn’t so she’s using that against me right now. I kept trying to convince her (which failed) that I wasn’t yelling that all I wanted was for her to let me finish making the coffee before I move the broom but then she started laughing and saying Well you won’t have to worry cause I’m never asking you to make anything for me ever again.
other instances includes
I made dinner and everything and so the kitchen was a bit of a mess and I guess some of the stuff was in front of the coffee machine (crucial detail to remember when I explain this later) and so I served everyone food first before me. As soon as I serve my portion I sit down to eat. I’m not even half way done with my food and my mom finishes hers first and then goes to kitchen and starts complaining how everything is all over and so she starts picking up everything and complaining over and over how I can’t clean right. I told her let me finish eating my food and I’ll clean up but no that answer wasn’t appropriate. She really was hinting at me to go clean up without a regard to if I finished eating. And after I finished I still had to clean and she goes after all the work I spent cleaning make me coffee and so inside I was pissed so I told her let me finished putting the dishes away and cleaning up what’s on the counter and she goes FORGET IT and starts sighing and makes it herself. then she starts blaming me and getting a worked up saying how she’s done picking up after me.
Remember I cooked! Served everyone before myself and then still had to clean the pots, pans, table, and wipe down counters.
Another recent incident was on her bday I wasn’t feeling well at all. I was cramping had a massive headache all day and so we had a reservation for dinner. She blames me how I didn’t plan time to pick up the cake cause I barely made it back home in time.
she blew up at me and said I hurt her feelings cause I said
If I felt better I would have allocated time and planned it better and she goes correct her statement and I said yeah if I felt better I really would have made time to do everything much earlier.
There’s other instances where I can’t even defend myself and if I do I’m extremely controlling and disrespectful. She goes you want the last word? All the time. Then she says well this won’t happen for much longer cause I’ll be 6 feet under! she either starts crying, throwing things Across the floor. If I don’t do what I’m asked at that second she goes does it herself and starts making a huge thing out of it.
hugs 
