Need help with convincing parents and uncle for a far from home University

[Congratsbaby]

Thankyou for this. Makes me feel a bit hopeful.
Can you explain what did you mean by the campus program thing you said?

Also , though I am not religious myself but this is very sweet of you. Thankyou oizy , I would have given you flowers by now if all this would be happening in person lol. You've been really nice to me.

Lots of great dialogue and guidance.

I certainly liked Beos’ suggestion about the very niche degree being exclusive to that particular uni.

If there are campus programs, research the benefits of those to show that you’d have an academic support group to ease their concerns in that area.

I would add to be mindful of listening more than talking. As you can analyze any objections during the first attempt and the next time you all talk, you would have prepared your convincing rebuttals to their concerns in a way that may help them understand and be open to your choices.

You can begin researching and applying for as many scholarships/grants now and that way you have the financial concerns addressed.

*** this next suggestion comes from you asking for prayer on another post of yours***

God hears our prayers. We Christ followers, are taught to go to God in prayer before facing the opposition ( like talking to your family). Intercessory prayer is when someone prays on behalf of others. I will lift you and your aspirations up in prayer, that your ambitions align with God’s will, in Jesus’ name.

 

[Beos]

Thankyou for this. Makes me feel a bit hopeful.
Can you explain what did you mean by the campus program thing you said?

Also , though I am not religious myself but this is very sweet of you. Thankyou oizy , I would have given you flowers by now if all this would be happening in person lol. You've been really nice to me.

I think one part would be like LGBTQIA+ group, a study group, a hobby that you have, or even marching band. It's a good way to make friends. and the other ensuring there is access to mental health resources and idk if you are trans but if so access to that gender affirming care since there is a push for universities to remove that.

 

[Congratsbaby]

I think one part would be like LGBTQIA+ group, a study group, a hobby that you have, or even marching band. It's a good way to make friends. and the other ensuring there is access to mental health resources and idk if you are trans but if so access to that gender affirming care since there is a push for universities to remove that.

I see , I wonder if this is what she meant.
But nonetheless , yes it is a good idea. I can research for these groups , tell them about it , though I have one in mind to convince them which is related to religion.

As for my own health and leisure , I will look into them and join according to my interests.

I am not trans , it is terrible what they are doing ( I think you mean the US right ?)

Thankyou.

 

[Oizys Moros]

@Congratsbaby

Programs on college campuses can consist of food pantry, financial literacy, 1st year student support, social skills support groups,
work study, job placement, internships, etc.

Read reviews and testimonials then highlight those points, such as 92% of students graduate with honors and are hired within 60 days of graduation. Uni has a consensus with Companies like Dell, Google, Microsoft and recruits/hires 30% of graduates.

Just a few great attributes about that particular university that stands out.

 

[Inastorm]

Out of interest, you dont need to name the course but what is the subject- art?, business?, medical?

My first degree in art didnt go very well, i was having a hard time with my mental health but the masters i did 20 years later in health was amazing and has really provided me with a good job.

 

[Congratsbaby]

@Congratsbaby

Programs on college campuses can consist of food pantry, financial literacy, 1st year student support, social skills support groups,
work study, job placement, internships, etc.

Read reviews and testimonials then highlight those points, such as 92% of students graduate with honors and are hired within 60 days of graduation. Uni has a consensus with Companies like Dell, Google, Microsoft and recruits/hires 30% of graduates.

Just a few great attributes about that particular university that stands out.

I see , thankyou.

 

[Congratsbaby]

Out of interest, you dont need to name the course but what is the subject- art?, business?, medical?

My first degree in art didnt go very well, i was having a hard time with my mental health but the masters i did 20 years later in health was amazing and has really provided me with a good job.

I am sorry , I don't want to name the field but I can't study or work ( unless I am going to die otherwise and I don't want to die yet lol ) into something I am not interested in.

 

[Mid Night]

Thankyou so much for your prayers. I really appreciate them.

Prayer edit: my prayer was unclear - "university counseling/protection(s)/guidance" meaning concerning the uncle.

 

[Congratsbaby]

Prayer edit: my prayer was unclear - "university counseling/protection(s)/guidance" meaning concerning the uncle.

Thankyou I appreciate it , especially now. I could really use it. Thankyou for praying for me. 🙇

 

[BlackSheep 007]

Studying, working, living far away...? Whatever it costs: Go ahead. You will not regret it.
1) You are old enough to decide for youself.
2) If it is a question of funds, offer to repay it (credit as you mentioned).
I do not reallly understand what's so difficult about this...?

 

[Congratsbaby]

Studying, working, living far away...? Whatever it costs: Go ahead. You will not regret it.
1) You are old enough to decide for youself.
2) If it is a question of funds, offer to repay it (credit as you mentioned).
I do not reallly understand what's so difficult about this...?

Thankyou sir. Lately I realised it's my right that I have earned indeed , that gives me courage to go through this talk and shit with them.

Difficult part are my legal guardians and uncle. For them , because I am a girl , loan is a bad thing , my degree isn't important enough and is just a bachelor's one , it's going to be so far away ( out of their control , though they phrase it as how will I manage myself *that part could be 2% true for them at Max* ) , safety , cultural differences and most importantly their belief that they can direct my life.

I believe I should also be allowed to wear what I want as a right over my body and myself , but does that happen? No.

Thankyou for the reminder , I will offer to pay the money back if needed.

 

[Congratsbaby]

Update : I actually didn't get in , in the first round list atleast. There will be two more. I will doubt , I will get in now. My rank isn't terrible , there are some reserved spots thing in India and I am not part of it. So , that's why but also to say , it's not ( my rank ) great. It's just somewhere in middle. I might have had more chances if there wasn't the reserved thing ( and I am not talking about physically disabled people necessarily ).

I am hoping to connect with a student helpline to get more info about upcoming lists etc.

I was going to talk to my mother today but I believe I will be dismissed more so , knowing that I didn't get in. And they will start looking for another nearby uni ( after knowing the course , I haven't told them yet )

 

[GFS]

Update : I actually didn't get in , in the first round list atleast. There will be two more. I will doubt , I will get in now. My rank isn't terrible , there are some reserved spots thing in India and I am not part of it. So , that's why but also to say , it's not ( my rank ) great. It's just somewhere in middle. I might have had more chances if there wasn't the reserved thing ( and I am not talking about physically disabled people necessarily ).

I am hoping to connect with a student helpline to get more info about upcoming lists etc.

I was going to talk to my mother today but I believe I will be dismissed more so , knowing that I didn't get in. And they will start looking for another nearby uni ( after knowing the course , I haven't told them yet )

It sucks! But let's hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Is there any other university that you can apply when you can be far enough from "it" and safe too?

 

[Congratsbaby]

It sucks! But let's hope for the best and prepare for the worst. Is there any other university that you can apply when you can be far enough from "it" and safe too?

Disclaimer :- Long post

It does suck indeed.

The university I am talking about here , I looked over the total expenses ( of which some , I didn't know of before ) and it doesn't feel worth it to me anymore.

I am worried , that will be the case in other unis as well.

Not like they aren't good enough necessarily , I just don't want to pay that much debt.

I cannot think of any unis with the description you've asked.

The last option uni , didn't get in it either. I am looking for this last option uni 's spot round admissions or basically vacant seats , and hoping to get in through that.

I am going to calculate the expenses between this last option uni and the uni I wanted to get into. I will go with the cheaper option.

Problems though , 1) spot round admissions will take place days later. It's going to be havoc by then , I will have to do something in the house.

2) even if I get into that faraway uni , the time in between they provide , when they release the results and give the date for physical verification , might not be enough for me to reach there on the date needed for physical verification ; due to a) not being prepared cause not sure if I would get in b) it will take me time to reach there because it's quite faraway . And if I fail to reach on that day , my admission might get cancelled. ( Unless I somehow get confirmation for my exception , but these people are getting so hard to contact. I have tried their emails and phone before )

3) if I do apply for another uni , except the last uni or this uni. I will probably have to pay it's fee and basically accept my admission , then the whole physical verification and whatever shit ( if I do get in ) before I can get the spot round results ( of the last uni ) and decide for myself what do I wanna do.

4) if I don't get in whichever is the cheapest uni , then I might just not be able to get into any unis cause the admissions are almost closing unless by paying more amount of extra money.

I didn't mean to rant , but if I update more which I probably will. You will know the backstory. Andd I thought you might wanna know what's going on.

 

[GFS]

Rant is ok, but that's no rant. You're just explaining how things are. All this sound stupid, I mean the way things are with admissions and stuff.

Anyway, IF you're determined to choose the "faraway" university, if admitted, then you should be prepare to leave asap (in case you get admitted) and in mean time try not getting your hopes too high, in case you don't get admitted, but I guess you're already doing the latter.

The other big catch, from what I read, is the debt, depending on how much you're willing to pay.
Which leads to the other question:
IF you don't get admitted in any university (knocking on wood!) or if the expenses are too high (hope not!) what other options do you have?
1. Can you apply again next year?
2. Considering next year you're 18 yo is an overseas (foreign) university an option?
3. Is there any other decent job in your country you can do that doesn't require a university degree but still giving you enough income to be independent?
4. Is working online an option? Even as a temporary job to let you have the money you need for the university without being in too much debt?

 

[Congratsbaby]

Rant is ok, but that's no rant. You're just explaining how things are. All this sound stupid, I mean the way things are with admissions and stuff.

Anyway, IF you're determined to choose the "faraway" university, if admitted, then you should be prepare to leave asap (in case you get admitted) and in mean time try not getting your hopes too high, in case you don't get admitted, but I guess you're already doing the latter.

The other big catch, from what I read, is the debt, depending on how much you're willing to pay.
Which leads to the other question:
IF you don't get admitted in any university (knocking on wood!) or if the expenses are too high (hope not!) what other options do you have?
1. Can you apply again next year?
2. Considering next year you're 18 yo is an overseas (foreign) university an option?
3. Is there any other decent job in your country you can do that doesn't require a university degree but still giving you enough income to be independent?
4. Is working online an option? Even as a temporary job to let you have the money you need for the university without being in too much debt?

Thankyou for all this.

My other option is staying at home and enduring more of these people and " it " while attending some bad college nearby. I don't want it.

1. Mother doesn't want that strictly. I do not myself for the sake of " I don't wanna endure this anymore "

2. Sir , a foreign uni will be more expensive. I can barely afford the national.

3. I think , there might be but I doubt it would be of my interest and parents wouldn't be okay with this.

4. I doubt I could make enough money for uni.

 

[GFS]

Thankyou for all this..

You're welcome.

I think , there might be but I doubt it would be of my interest and parents wouldn't be okay with this.

They're that fanatic, huh? Women belong in the kitchen, kinda mentality?
The "of my interest part" reminds me of an old saying "Find what do you like to do and then find someone to pay you for that". lol It sounds like a joke but it's not a bad advice.
Have you found what's in your interest? What do you like to do?

4. I doubt I could make enough money for uni.

That's true, very probably you won't make enough money for the university from a decent online part-time job, but it might help a little.

I apologize if I'm making you feel frustrated, I understand that your circumstances leave you short of options.

 

[Congratsbaby]

You're welcome.




They're that fanatic, huh? Women belong in the kitchen, kinda mentality?
The "of my interest part" reminds me of an old saying "Find what do you like to do and then find someone to pay you for that". lol It sounds like a joke but it's not a bad advice.
Have you found what's in your interest? What do you like to do?



That's true, very probably you won't make enough money for the university from a decent online part-time job, but it might help a little.

I apologize if I'm making you feel frustrated, I understand that your circumstances leave you short of options.

Yes , that is their mentality. They would still want , if possible for the woman to bring money to the home but she is less than man and must do really well in household chores / etc.

I know my interest but I do not think I can make money of it , yet atleast. I do not want to share my interest here.

I agree with you. I just don't think , I can handle a job at the moment while trying to figure out the college thing.

It is okay. You do not have to apologise. It is not your fault.

Thankyou for the response.

 

[GFS]

I know my interest but I do not think I can make money of it , yet atleast. I do not want to share my interest here.

That's good. Knowing what do you want to do/become is a good start.

I agree with you. I just don't think , I can handle a job at the moment while trying to figure out the college thing.

That is understandable. I really hope you won't have to endure more of all that and get a safe way out of it.
Sending you hugs, if that's okay.

 

[Congratsbaby]

That's good. Knowing what do you want to do/become is a good start.



That is understandable. I really hope you won't have to endure more of all that and get a safe way out of it.
Sending you hugs, if that's okay.

Thankyou. This means something. 🫂