Wow, I started 2015 with a concussive bang. I wanted to start this topic, as I have not posted in years. I sincerely miss this support group. This collection of anonymous human beings all here for different reasons. I have met people I have admired, others I have not. Ultimately, we're all subjectively viewed, carbon-based lifeforms divorced from our animal kingdom, and left in this bizarre, biological purgatory wherein we espouse the phenomena of consciousness. I have come to find I am no longer suicidal, but just a hardened, emotionally disingenuous shell of my former self. Suicide is not even an option on the table. And I'm starting to see if I continue down this emotional, cobblestone street -- I'll wind up like men in their forties who can cry on cue. I want to embrace parts of my old, perceived identity. Compassionate, loving, sincere. Three tenets I have come to realise, require a greater deal of fearlessness than anything else. Plainly, I need to fix myself. Both in conviction emotionally and intellectually. I need to start my business, and get the ball rolling. As opposed to complaining, or letting a beer do my thinking. Speaking as a late-twenties male, I want a family, and I cannot merely happen a legacy, and children with my current mental framework. I need to remedy those problems. At this point, I'd like to conclude there is something to be said for expressing one's emotions in a text-based, articulate context. There is something crystallising, fortifying, empowering... Thank-you for listening, clicking, even thinking that somebody out there, a complete stranger is viewing my words, and mentally processing them...it makes me happy. And I'm not being based on my looks, charisma, or other superfluous trickery. But by...my brain. Wow, I miss this.