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[sadhart]

I hate Saturdays. It's just nothing but crowds of couples and families and slow moving people. And when I say that I don't mean the elderly or someone with a disability. Like, I'm walking behind this big muscular guy who is taking these little baby steps as if he's walking for the first time.

But there was this jazz festival downtown in my area, and I made it a goal to try going to it. I should have known though it would be way too congested. I'm just not feeling it and it was a pain in the ass walking here. I know it's me mostly just not being comfortable around people. But I don't know how sitting here watching dumbass couples walk by is supposed to do that.

Sorry, I know this is a stupid thing to go on about. But I am constantly in conflict with hating life and being a part of it even though it feels like I can never be.

 

[AvidFan]

You can go on about whatever you like! I often find the same thing, I used to love going to live music gigs but often struggle with all the congestion and masses of people. Still trying to get to one! Hey at least you tried and got out there.

 

[iloverachel]

 

[iloverachel]

I know how you feel
I absolutely dread leaving the house, because i am not welcome anywhere, and feel like a loner outcast loser.
No point leaving the home if you never fit in anywhere
Its tough

 

[Maniae]

I am totally impressed by not only the desire to go but the actual engagement of attending the jazz festival.
Let this experience be a learning process to prepare you mentally for the next time.
You explored although you knew it would be congested. Maybe learn to sightsee slower, walk slower and enjoy the surroundings w/o time restrictions and the need to scurry.
Find humor and joy as you observe the dumbass people. IJS