My sister in law committed suicide on Thursday night. She was recently diagnosed with bipolar and had been put on loads of medication. I was close to her as we got on so well and I also have bipolar so I understood so much of what she was going through. Her sisters were downright mean to her and had no compassion for how she felt. She wanted to visit here to see my kids (she adored them so much and they are devastated by this. I honestly don't know what I'm feeling. I can't go to the funeral as we only have enough money for my husband (her brother) to go over to Ireland at such short notice after the holidays. My husband is over there at the moment and spent the day shaking hands with everyone. Today was the Wake, she is back at home in the front room. My husband has PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and is on medication because he has attempted suicide in the past during a psychotic episode. However today when I spoke to him he was very calm and this worries me. I don't know how this will affect me, I don't want to lose the plot, I've attempted suicide several times in the past and I worry that my brain won't tolerate this much pain. I loved her so much and miss her already. I just don't know how to react.