Question about mood spikes

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Lorax, Aug 13, 2013.

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  1. Lorax

    Lorax Well-Known Member

    I have been in a severe "high" for a few weeks now. It occasionally dips, but this time it's been very persistent.

    My question is, is it weird to feel suicidal, or have severely depressing thoughts during these phases?

    I have had them for a very very long time (highs/lows) and it's not new. But it leaves me confused as to why i can be so energetic, talkative, alert, and some times "happy" yet i still feel like ending it. Or how i can have such sad thoughts, yet i laugh, or get mad rather than depressed.

    I'm mainly wondering if this is "normal" in such an elevated state. If anyone knows.
  2. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    hi lorax. I read your post. but I do not know. I have heard people say that when they are on a high they have lots of intrusive thoughts. But I do not know enough about the condition to give you any kind of intelligent answer. The only reason I answered is because I wanted to make sure you knew I read it and I care.
  3. Lorax

    Lorax Well-Known Member

    Yea, i read that you can run high risk during "highs" it doesn't make sense.. Thank you for caring, can't think of a last sentence, i apologize. Kinda sleepy.
  4. emily83

    emily83 Well-Known Member

    in my experience, yes... i still feel suicidal/ depressed at times, even on a high. in fact- you took the words from me.. you can laugh and be happy, but still have those small moments (and they are extremely small), where you think about the end

    i think i'd also say, it depends on the person and on how severe the moods are- their's no right or wrong answer.

    but their's my experience
  5. fransigne

    fransigne Active Member

    My last suicide attempt was when I was feeling really good about myself and my relationships. I wanted to end my life before it turned sour again.
  6. Lorax

    Lorax Well-Known Member

    I guess i'm not alone at least. In my particular case, it's a bit intense. Really depressed, yet i have symptoms of extreme highs. I actually laughed after bonking my knee (don't ask) ((bc i don't know))

    Or laughing when i tell my friend about sad stuff. It's a bit of a joke between us, if i laugh he asks what's wrong. Joking aside, yea, just my personal severity.

    I guess it could be certain "triggers"? Even being happy, someone says something to bring memories. Or you see certain objects? Those are two common ones for me.

    Hopefully you can have more times without the thoughts. Like they say, bring out a smile, you may save a life.
  7. Lorax

    Lorax Well-Known Member

    I haven't attempted when feeling optimistic personally. I do get where you're coming from though. I've felt that way in really good times. It's hard to see the future pains in life. But when life throws you a curve ball, hit it with the bat! Life that is.

    Hope that might make you smile. To be serious though, you're not alone. I can relate to that feeling. Hope maybe there's something helpful in these words.
  8. darkdays

    darkdays Active Member

    You can definitely be suicidal when in a manic phase. I think what you are describing may be a mixed state where the moods cycle so fast that you feel as if you are experiencing two intense moods at once, such as happiness and sadness. Also, I would think that when you are manic and in a high state, too much of a good thing can be pure poison. Imagine having a song stuck in your head that you love and which fits your present mood perfectly. It's there for a few hours and then gone. now imagine that it's there for three weeks straight, from the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep, relentlessly playing your favorite lines ad nausea. I once met a woman who had been extremely manic, finally decided she had had enough and walked out onto a busy street and proceeded to offer motorists money if they would run over her with their cars. You asked if it's normal. If normal means it happens quite frequently, then yes, it is normal. But what is ever really normal in mental illness?
  9. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    Great explination darkdays. Informative and clear.
  10. Lorax

    Lorax Well-Known Member

    Very concise, but not judgmental. Do you happen to know what brings on a mixed state? Or is it part of why you feel depressed, or manic in the first place?

    It does get tiring fast. Too much energy to burn off, and talking about everything under the sun. Or being so "up" under strange circumstances.

    I can understand wanting it to be over. It's kind of comforting to know it's common. Mental health is a tricky one for sure. Thank you for the info.
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