Really difficult time right now

[na-taya]

I have been away from home since the 15th of October.
I was ment to be home Tuesday.
I stayed on to help care for my pop so he could be at home with his wife and dog. So I helped care for him right till the end.

Today is his funeral.......I am basically the only family member in my pops side as he remarried once my nan passed years ago. Sometimes I feel I don't belong!!

Also straigh after the funeral I will be with my dad. Now my dad was not nice to me and it won't be easy as I'm already so vunrable right now.

I get home on the 5th of November, but I spend a few days with my bro before I go back so I hope that is some down time that I need.

I'm so overwhelmed with emotions and anxiety I am doing my best to keep it all together but it's really not easy and I have broke down a few times!!

Please think of me and try remind me I can do this, coz I seriously feel like I cant

 

[Rockclimbinggirl]

Hugs. You can do it.

 

[PhoenixFailed]

I will be thinking of you over these next few days. You can do it. Look at all you have already have gotten through. We will be here to support you. I will check back. Hugs!

 

[Atreides]

You can do it. When you feel overwhelmed just stop and breathe.

 

[na-taya]

Thanks I made the funeral and they read a special thanks for me extending my holiday to help care for him......I didn't want thanks or people to tell me how wonderful I am......I did it for my pop and my na and that's it.

I left basically as soon as the funeral finished I couldn't handle that many people and it's been 9 days with pop and helping my nan. So I'm exhausted

But now any dads house I'm stuck here till Wednesday and I not sure I made the right choice especially with what my head is at.

I just feel I'm going to crack and burn either soon or as soon as I get home.