Ruined my own life

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Comradericardo, Oct 28, 2008.

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  1. Comradericardo

    Comradericardo New Member

    Hi everyone. To start off, I will say what ive done is all my own fault, to an extent. I started work in a nursing home about 5 months ago, it was my first ever job, I had looked before for work but noone would hire me as i had no experience, but after taking this nursing course, i got work easily. Around this time, I met a girl online, who I ended up loving a whole lot. She loved me too and we met while i was about halfway through doing the course, then 3 weeks after i had to go home, she left me, saying i was too 'clingy' for calling her 3 times a week on her request. That was straw one broken, i struggled after that, but i finished the course and got my first job, which turned out alot different to what i thought it would be. My workmates turned out to be the biggest group of backstabbing bitches the world has ever known. They gossiped about me behind my back, said that i was 'hopeless' because I didnt work as fast as they did, even though they had at least 20 years more experience in the field than I did. I worked my arse off when I was there. One day, after a particularly bad shift, I just snapped and resigned on the spot. I still live with my parents, and they dont know I quit, 3 months ago now. I have tried to get work at other places, but to no avail. All because I couldn't cope with the workplace abuse. Now there is a car registration bill coming up, I dont have the money left over to pay for it and they will find out. I wanted to die all through working, now I dont think i have another choice. My parents will yell at me and abuse me when they find out, i cant take this anymore :sad:
  2. middleofnowhere

    middleofnowhere Well-Known Member

    Hey, comrade. I'm sorry life has dumped you where it has. I hope you'll soon find another job, but be warned - there are backstabbers in whatever occupation you have. It's their problem, not yours unless you make it yours. I know full well the damage they can do, though, having been there a number of times. No fun. Promise yourself every day that you'll make it through that day. Life only happens in minutes, so we can't worry about the past minute or the next minute. Live in the minute and make the best you can for that minute.

  3. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    sorry to see you have felt the jealous stupidity of others in the workplace, these are the people who deserve to be ignored, i know its hard when your suffering depression but its the only way to deal with such childish people and you will find it where ever you find work.

    just remember that you are better than they are.

    be safe
  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi and isn't it the school of hard knocks that each of us go through...maybe this was not the job meant for you??? I have worked in many nursing homes, and they can be quite a challenge, especially the may be times to revisit what you want to do...maybe online courses or distance learning so you can start without having to travel??? just my 2 sense...but wanted you to know that it might be good taste to not want to work there...big hugs,J
  5. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    Hi mate. I know a lot of people who work or have worked in care homes and they all say what a tough job it is. Not because of the people who they have to look after but usually it's problems with the people they work with or the crazy things that the management expects them to do. A lot of these places are really badly funded and the workers get so fed up. Seems to me that you just got the brunt of their own anger and frustration. If I were you I'd try and explain things to your parents. They are going to find out you have sacked your job sooner or later. If you don't get the support you should from them then you are young enough to start afresh on your own. I've looked at your profile and sent you a pm. As for relationships. I was head over heals in love when I was your age but we split when I went to college. I thought I'd never get over it but realize now that it was just a part of growing up. You've got plenty of time to meet someone else. Take care.
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