Sad and alone

[Foreignwoman]

Today I feel so sad and alone. My dear boyfriend is sick again. A week ago he told me that he went to a clinic that friday before. He told me he went walking with his colleagues that friday instead. When he came back I asked him how it was to see everyone again, so he told me briefly about it.
On monday he told me that he went to the clinic instead and did some tests and he received the results on monday and they were bad.

I nurse him as good as I can, but I feel so sad because he didn’t tell me he went and lied about it. Feel worthless.

 

[Nick]

I'm sorry to hear your boyfriend is sick. It's always hard to see someone you care about unwell.

He may not have told you because he didn't want you to worry. While I would say that's probably the wrong choice on his part, at the time he may have thought he was saving you having to worry while he waited for the test results. He may have thought everything was fine, and didn't want to cause a fuss over nothing. I can sort of see his logic there, flawed logic, but I can see where he may have thought that was a good plan.

If he didn't trust you he wouldn't have later told you the truth about where he was, or the test results. I wouldn't say it's a matter a trust. I'm sorry that it makes you feel worthless though. When he's feeling better maybe that's something the two of you can talk about.

Hang in there, and I hope he feels better soon.

 

[Foreignwoman]

Thank you Nick, for responding, it made me cry, because that was exactly the reason why he didn’t tell me. I agree, it is flawed, we are a long time together, this month 30 years. He always talks about togetherness, so this seems atypical.
We talked about it and he agrees that it was a mistake.
It is hard to see him so ill, he seems to have a hard time accepting it.

 

[may71]

I feel so sad because he didn’t tell me he went and lied about it

Sorry that this happened.

I think sometimes people think they are doing loved ones a favor by keeping things like this from them, because they think they will worry. So maybe he thought he could get the tests, and if they came back negative he would just not say anything.

Hugs

 

[Foreignwoman]

Thank you may71, for responding. That is just what I asked him; If the results were negative, would you have told me you went? He said yes on that. Other than that, I find it hard that he went through all this alone, so for me he made it worse.

Hugs back

 

[KM76710]

Most sad to hear of all that you are going through currently with your life. It does sound a tough situation and wishes for the best for you.

 

[Foreignwoman]

Thank you KM ❤️
Today I took care of him and tried to be upbeat about it, at the moment he is angry at me because he is in so much pain and blames me for reacting not sweet enough. Sigh. Sometimes it is never enough...can’t be sweet 24/7.

 

[Lane]

Today I feel so sad and alone. My dear boyfriend is sick again. A week ago he told me that he went to a clinic that friday before. He told me he went walking with his colleagues that friday instead. When he came back I asked him how it was to see everyone again, so he told me briefly about it.
On monday he told me that he went to the clinic instead and did some tests and he received the results on monday and they were bad.

I nurse him as good as I can, but I feel so sad because he didn’t tell me he went and lied about it. Feel worthless.

You always have us and it's good to see you but sorry that it's under these circumstances. I'm very sorry to hear about your boyfriend. He's fortunate to have your love and support @Foreignwoman . Even those days where you don't feel great, good enough will suffice. And you are definately not worthless...but smart, kind, resourceful, funny to name a few.

 

[Foreignwoman]

Thank you Dear @Lane ❤️
Today is the worst, I try not to cry, but it is 3 in the afternoon and he didn’t congratulate me. It’s my birthday today, no gifts ( which I bought, so I know they are there), nothing. I can’t help wondering why I didn’t see why he is so selfish. So sad. I want to leave the house and never come back.

 

[may71]

I'm sorry you're having such a sad birthday

Sending hugs

 

[Foreignwoman]

Thank you dear @may71 ❤
hugs back