Shit night

[anarulesmenow]

The title says it all. I've said before how my mother doesn't believe that I'm bipolar, despite the fact I've been to the doctor with it. Tonight it all came to a head. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow for it, and my mum had been saying stuff about how she didn't believe I was bipolar and I've been down recently and said I wanted to cancel it. She went completely ape shit and started saying shit like 'You disgust me, I can't take you out in public, there's nothing really wrong with you'. She had been coming with me to the appointment, and this reinforced me not wanting to go.
So I decided to go to the pub, I needed to get out. She said if I went I couldn't come back but I went anyway (kinda my fault she tried to kick me out then).
I had a bit to drink and she said I couldn't come back so my friend said I could stay at hers (I didn't tell her about the bipolar thing, no one knows) so I went home to collect some stuff.

 

[total eclipse]

well you get yourself to that doctors appt and you get some help to get you stable make your life more level okay look after you hugs

 

[anarulesmenow]

Thanks but im wanting to take pills and I dont feel I can go to the doctors now

 

[total eclipse]

then you call crisis line and talk to someone okay keep safe

 

[anarulesmenow]

Its not that easy... Hence the forum

 

[starryeyed]

Mother sounded wrong.try find your own place .

 

[anarulesmenow]

I was speaking to a friend last night in a state and asked her what to do and this morning on facebook where everyone can see she wrote 'Do I assume you've fixed your life then?' in a really sarcastic manner, and some of our friends liked what she put. Feeling shit now, she's one of my closest friends and it's just totally reinforced the fact that people don't care. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed now.

 

[Monoka]

Is it because people don't care or do they just not understand.

Try not to distance yourself from your friends, your going to need people you can rely on if your family is not being supportive.
make sure you see a professional, they will know more about the problem than prejudice people who don't understand.

Hope you can sort something out
:console:

 

[anarulesmenow]

I don't whether it's because they don't care or they don't understand, but it just seemed a little callous

 

[Monoka]

It is, but don't give up on them. would explaining the problem to them make it easier for them to understand. even if its only one friend, someone to be able to talk frankly to. give them the chance to understand- they probably don't understand your suffering.
i have one and it keeps me sane during the bad times.

 

[anarulesmenow]

There's no point telling them, they won't understand it.

 

[IV2010]

I hope you go to the doctors appointment and get the help you want..
dont' let others put you off..they don't understand

I think it's good you are trying to help yorself..a positive step
you are the most important person ..... take care