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IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Please read THIS THREAD about a rebrand for SF.
Sick of myself.
- Thread starter littlebuns124
- Start date
I think you should try to give yourself some credit for the work you have out in @littlebuns124. Sorry that you're feeling unmotivated though. I'm glad that you are here and sharing how you feel with us. 
I think that, right around that time of life, or age in mine (my life). . . give or take a year or two, on either side: but our tiny little town & school suffered 3 loses of high school students in like 4 years (time). And I'd always wondered, if, had they have lived - & gotten a "second chance," or an opportunity to do a 're-do,' or 'do-over,' from their act(s); how many of them would have elected not to have done it then in the first place. And been able to just... start over (fresh) to morrow? I've always felt that, since I kind of new one of them semi-well, and the other, more moderately so, I guess (at best) & then the other one not quite so much, but I do believe he was fond of me, & feel terribly because I was likely the last person he spoke to, or with before leaving and then leaving, if you. . . it wasn't because of me, it was my position at the time, and i was the one he had his last contact with prior to leaving the building for the day ("sick,") or something... It's a very eerie feeling to have, I mean, I'm not sure what I could have said to try & convince him or to stop him but: . .. .(I just don't know, I'll never forget that look in his eyes, and the expression on his face - it was very 'at peace.') maybe I should have suspected something but my head was crammed pretty far up it, and so I was unconscious to say the least (as to all of what was about to go down)~*
So if you are thinking along these lines, maybe this then, can be your opportunity to go reach out and seek some professional help, in the event that that may help (and also assuming you haven't faithfully put forth the effort in trying to do so already, of course). But it's always bugged, or bothered me, that none of these what would now be middle-aged men, never got that "second chance." The old saying that, 'We need to learn from the mistakes of others, so that we don't make them on our own (or however that goes)." Could apply here, or maybe not? I don't know, and I apologize if that was over-blown, and just way too much. As it's not in any way shape or form reflective of where you stand or where you're heading. So i may have been jumping to conclusions just a bit, based on where it is that you've now shown up (at) / just in terms of, who's front door it is (and all).
So if you are thinking along these lines, maybe this then, can be your opportunity to go reach out and seek some professional help, in the event that that may help (and also assuming you haven't faithfully put forth the effort in trying to do so already, of course). But it's always bugged, or bothered me, that none of these what would now be middle-aged men, never got that "second chance." The old saying that, 'We need to learn from the mistakes of others, so that we don't make them on our own (or however that goes)." Could apply here, or maybe not? I don't know, and I apologize if that was over-blown, and just way too much. As it's not in any way shape or form reflective of where you stand or where you're heading. So i may have been jumping to conclusions just a bit, based on where it is that you've now shown up (at) / just in terms of, who's front door it is (and all).
@ littlebuns124 - You're young enough to expect more signs of progress to still be coming your way.
And if you've already put in a lot of work, perhaps a short pause now might be in order.
It's way too soon to be thinking you're useless. And if you think you're lacking in motivation, it might be prudent to reassess your goals.
Identify a purpose that you're good enough at that it's worthwhile to get better at. A purpose that you like doing. A purpose that the world has a need for......or that there are job openings for. And a purpose that pays you some money to live on.
I wish I was your age again.
And if you've already put in a lot of work, perhaps a short pause now might be in order.
It's way too soon to be thinking you're useless. And if you think you're lacking in motivation, it might be prudent to reassess your goals.
Identify a purpose that you're good enough at that it's worthwhile to get better at. A purpose that you like doing. A purpose that the world has a need for......or that there are job openings for. And a purpose that pays you some money to live on.
I wish I was your age again.