ive been going to therapists and councellers and doctors and psycologists since the age of 2. im 17. im tired. i feel so ungrateful. what could i possibly want that i dont have? sure im fincancially unstable, have loads of family problems but i have a roof over my head. i have a bed and food. at the start of 2022 i fell into a major depressive episode. i didnt eat, shower, drink. i self harmed all the time. was in and out of A&E like a yoyo. but in august, everything seemd....ok. hey, id lost my two favourite people, but i was doing good. the bullying stopped, the self harm decreased significatly. and i realised its not the environment, there was no trigger, it just seemed to happen. and scince november ive been wobbling. which is fine, everyone wobbles, id get back on my feet. but that feeling of dread, that numb emptiness that used to drown me in 22 has come back. i dont know how to describe it, im doing well. i have friends. im doing well at college. really well. so whats the problem? i feel lonely, and out of place. i hallucinate and hear things and im so tired all the time. when i look in the mirror i want to rip my face off. i want to hurt myself all the time. i feel like screaming. running away. i dont know what to do. im terrified ill slip back into how i was. you dont realise how mad things are until you look back, once youre in a better place. i cannot do it again. i cant. and now i dont have the two people that were there for me before. theyre gone. and i feel like im drowning.
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- Thread starter Ash07
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I hope that you get to feeling better and uplifted soon.
Maybe try to find 2 or 3 activities, people, objects that brings you joy or could bring you joy. Get a plant ( even a cactus 🌵) tend to it, nurture it, talk to it, love it. Learn to care for it.
Then see yourself in it. Just as the plant needs your care. YOU need your care too. Learn to look in the mirror and see positivity and the GOOD in yourself. You are worthy.
We can have good things in life and still be unhappy. It doesn't mean that we are ungrateful. We are just unhappy and our happiness isn't tied to those aspects of life.
Challenge yourself. Every day list something positive that happened. Try it for a week then look back at that list and realize that you are grateful.
I wish you the best in your decisions and your mood.
Maybe try to find 2 or 3 activities, people, objects that brings you joy or could bring you joy. Get a plant ( even a cactus 🌵) tend to it, nurture it, talk to it, love it. Learn to care for it.
Then see yourself in it. Just as the plant needs your care. YOU need your care too. Learn to look in the mirror and see positivity and the GOOD in yourself. You are worthy.
We can have good things in life and still be unhappy. It doesn't mean that we are ungrateful. We are just unhappy and our happiness isn't tied to those aspects of life.
Challenge yourself. Every day list something positive that happened. Try it for a week then look back at that list and realize that you are grateful.
I wish you the best in your decisions and your mood.
I'm sooo sorry....I have hallucinations and I hear voices too..Please don't ever listen to the voices..You can manage those symptoms and still live a happy life..I'm so sorry that you're suffering rn..hugsss.....you can Pm me if you want to..feel free to..And please work on yourself to be grateful..bcos that's the surest way to increase the quality of life..hugsss....
I understand that feeling of dread and loneliness which creeps in despite other stuff going along seemingly pretty well.
I hope being here makes your loneliness at least a little less sharp.
Take care of your physical health - I find consistent exercise and eating meals that are (mostly) healthy helps.
I hope being here makes your loneliness at least a little less sharp.
Take care of your physical health - I find consistent exercise and eating meals that are (mostly) healthy helps.
@Ash07
Sad to hear how things are going and how you are feeling, but glad that you are with us because you are in a welcoming place here where we are caring and hoping for your best. You do matter and hopefully things will improve for you. This is a place to get to know others that are understanding and will listen.
Sad to hear how things are going and how you are feeling, but glad that you are with us because you are in a welcoming place here where we are caring and hoping for your best. You do matter and hopefully things will improve for you. This is a place to get to know others that are understanding and will listen.