Hi. How is everyone. I have been out drinking again. I know I shouldn't as I am on anti depressants but I feel it's a way of forgetting everything. But when I stop drinking there is this urge to cause myself harm. I would not class myself as an alcoholic but when i drink I don't want to stop as it makes me feel relaxed. I have no one to turn to exept you guys and I am sorry for putting my issues on you folks. I wish something would happen to me. Like getting hit by a car or falling into a river just something to take this pain away.