Hi, I'm not a hoarder in that I collect things. I come home and can't cope with doing anything, the mess builds up, we need clothes or things, can't find them in the mess so go out and by more stuff. A never ending circle. I have a clear out when kind have a home inspection every now and then but it is immensely stressful and I've run out of places to successfully hide stuff away. Living in a mess is awful. Ironic that I'm a Housekeeper and clean rooms for a living! I'm good at my job but have a mental block when I get home. After a clear up it feels so much better and I vow to keep up the good work but then I fall behind within a day or two and its back to a mess. I know it's as simple as picking things up and putting them away but it's like asking me to shoot a cat, I can't bring myself to do it! I feel utterly stupid that I cannot get to grips with it. Ok, we don't have much room for storage but that is just an excuse. I wonder if it stems from my childhood, my parents are the ultimate minimalists. Everything was chucked away if not put away. I remember feeling sick to the stomach at my school jumble sale with my mother when I saw a box with Rupert the bear annuals and asked my mum if I could look in case there were any I didn't have. She replied that they were all mine that she'd donated. That was around forty years ago and it still hurts. Ridiculous I know. I had a rabbit, floppy bunny, he got old and tatty and I remember crying when he was thrown out. Likewise my knitted Poodle. They were my friends when I was a child, all taken and got rid of. But I'm not a child anymore, I'm an adult in charge of my own home. I must get rid of everything and only keep what's needed. My boyfriend says its laziness, pure and simple. It's not, I'm not a lazy person, I like doing things, I'm just overwhelmed when its in a terrible state and don't know where to start and on a daily basis find it hard to do, like there is a mental block preventing. Me. I once spent three months unable to set foot in my kitchen. The children, teenagers helped themselves and just made a big stinking mess and I took them out for food every day at great expense which has ruined our finances. Only I can change but i feel so helpless which sounds absolutely pathetic but is the truth. When I housesit my boyfriends immaculate house for a week when he goes on holiday, I keep it clean and tidy with no problems, why can't I cope at home?