Suicidal Thoughts - Are you Feeling Suicidal Today?
- Thread starter Petal
- Start date
I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE that a family member self-ending supposedly increases one's likelihood of becoming suicidal. If not for that I really could do it. I could go do it. I looked it up. In a few hours I could.
But my loved ones deserve to want life and enjoy it as they can. I can't go risk doing something that would jeopardize that.
But my loved ones deserve to want life and enjoy it as they can. I can't go risk doing something that would jeopardize that.
That's the thing, I don't see any way through this. It basically just became my life sadly. I kill myself at work like it's the only thing that maintains me alive. In a sense it does cause gotta pay the bills..
I just don't see myself living like this till i get old.
It's just miserable.
I'm the main person who's see's it everyday in the glass. Until the day everybody else see's it..
I'd rather die before as the shame would be worse than death...
(Sorry i couldn't reply sooner)
I just don't see myself living like this till i get old.
It's just miserable.
I'm the main person who's see's it everyday in the glass. Until the day everybody else see's it..
I'd rather die before as the shame would be worse than death...
(Sorry i couldn't reply sooner)
Life can be so hard sometimes. I hope you can find a bit of peace real soon @Lostman85. 
Life can be so hard sometimes. I hope you can find a bit of peace real soon @Lostman85.
That's ok. It's ok to reply only if you want to and only when you want to.
Is there a reason why you can't talk to her about the beneath the surface stuff?
There's some reason why you want to die, it's just that you don't know it yet. It could be something psychological that you aren't aware of, or maybe it's just something on a physical level.
There may be some treatments you could try that would make you feel better.
Is there a reason why you can't talk to her about the beneath the surface stuff?
There's some reason why you want to die, it's just that you don't know it yet. It could be something psychological that you aren't aware of, or maybe it's just something on a physical level.
There may be some treatments you could try that would make you feel better.
Yes. So disgusting.
At least I'm excavating why. That doesn't change the fact that I want to kill myself to avenge not only the life and time wasted and made not mine when I could have had it, but also what made it possible, and my own disgusting reaction to it.
Not just to avenge, but also shed what feels like a contaminated instance of my body. Normally the image of a human having fruit-like properties is funny; but in this case, I feel myself needing to peel - peel- my very flesh off of my mind-soul like an orange.
At least I'm excavating why. That doesn't change the fact that I want to kill myself to avenge not only the life and time wasted and made not mine when I could have had it, but also what made it possible, and my own disgusting reaction to it.
Not just to avenge, but also shed what feels like a contaminated instance of my body. Normally the image of a human having fruit-like properties is funny; but in this case, I feel myself needing to peel - peel- my very flesh off of my mind-soul like an orange.
I’m not making plans, but I’m facing a lot of problems right now that all seem to have a common root cause. My financial, emotional, and physical failings are all related to the human condition of being in charge of a body that is a lot of work to care for, and only gets more difficult to maintain over time. Every human experiences birth and death. If we live long enough, we will also experience aging and illness along the way. If I end it now, I could sidestep those two.
However, if I did, it would not end my pain, but instead merely redistribute it! The people who care about me would bear that suffering in proportion to how much they care, and that’s not something I want for them. I kind of think about it as how would I talk to someone I love in the opposite situation, namely if they were overwhelmed with pain and difficulties, would I tell them to go ahead and kill themself? I feel like I cannot take my own life if I would not want to see someone I love deeply to do the same.
However, if I did, it would not end my pain, but instead merely redistribute it! The people who care about me would bear that suffering in proportion to how much they care, and that’s not something I want for them. I kind of think about it as how would I talk to someone I love in the opposite situation, namely if they were overwhelmed with pain and difficulties, would I tell them to go ahead and kill themself? I feel like I cannot take my own life if I would not want to see someone I love deeply to do the same.