I’m struggling a lot right now. The thoughts are now telling me to seek release, as in kms. I feel like I could go all the way through with it, too. I usually have a sense that if I really had a method in hand and ready to use, I would chicken out at the last minute. I don’t have that feeling now.
The main thing holding me back is my reasons to not do it. I’m starkly aware, though, that without the harm that my exit would entail, I would need the coroner within 24 hours. I feel terribly stupid.