Suicidal Thoughts - Are you Feeling Suicidal Today?

[Pebble mouse]

Sounds rude

Oh, I'm so sorry. My post was meant to be supportive, not rude. I apologise for that.

 

[may71]

Sending hugs to anyone who would like hugs

 

[AmberMarie]

The desire is still swirling around me 90% of the time. The other 10% is consumed with actual enjoyment that pushes those swirls out the door for a short bit of time.

i don't want to burden anyone, so i keep quiet most of the time.

 

[Windhover]

The thoughts can access my mind too easily, things aren't right but for now I'm still trying to push myself along.

 

[I_waste_everything]

I am actively choosing to not commit suicide
I am actively choosing to not commit suicide
I am actively choosing to not commit suicide
I am actively choosing to not commit suicide
I am actively choosing to not commit suicide
but it has appeal

 

[trachea]

I've been contemplating on doing it. I researched and found out my plan was stupid and searched for more ways.

I'm so confused right now as to why I'm here. I'm not sure if a part of me wants help. A part of me still wants that exit. What a normal day at work tomorrow will probably be full of stress again.

 

[Angie]

Yes, and at a level I haven't been in a very long time.

If the ideation doesn't ease up I'll have to go inpatient.

 

[may71]

Sending hugs to anyone who would like hugs

 

[I_waste_everything]

Yes. Specifically in need to give myself my just desserts for having neglected and holed up through the vast majority of 'time' in this life-attempt-opportunity instead of actually pushing myself to change something, help at all, or be human.

I feel like killing myself (though I don't know how) would be me executing a belated duty. A duty I don't touch yet, both for the typical reason of fear of pain and death, and because other obligations, obtuse ones mostly, obstruct it. Mom and sister have told me that if I were to die it would break them- especially if it was by my own hand- and my dad outright had a panic attack when I even began to bring it up.

More secularly, they need money help, and I bring in some money with my job at the deli.

 

[trachea]

I had like 6 hrs of sleep. I was sad that I woke up. My first thoughts today were: "here we go again..." and something I wont elaborate - might be too sensitive.

There's this weird feeling that I just want to strangle myself.

 

[AmberMarie]

Yes, and at a level I haven't been in a very long time.

If the ideation doesn't ease up I'll have to go inpatient.

Huge, Giant, Comforting HUGS are available... special for you if you want them Angie.

 

[AmberMarie]

Uncertain what i feel right now. i immersed myself in a series on Disney for a distraction. Now... there is no distraction... so many swirling thoughts and desires throughout every part of my existence.

 

[Road to Nowhere]