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tell your Mental Health story here!

Jayjay289

Jay Jay from the UK
SF Pro
#1
So here is a question, what is your mental health story?

  • How did it begin
  • what was the trigger
  • what did you realise
  • how quick did you find help
  • do you feel your on the road to recovery
This would be interesting to see everyone's mental health journey.

My story started in mid 90's when I started losing my head and started self harming, in 2002 I sought help from my GP as I knew something wasn't right and I was just put anti depressant's, no explanation no nothing then in mid 2000's i got a lot worse the self harming was out of control and my life was on a downward spiral, i was losing my self left right and centre, i went to see a doctor and got referred to a local Dr who then diagnosed me as being Bi-Polar, I was then put on hefty drugs that did more harm then good and I was way out of control and as a result I lost my marriage, my step kids, my home. in 2012 I pushed for a second opinion where i was then diagnosed as BPD and put on a new drug that really helped and helped me get a grip and control again of my life, sure i was still pretty sick and self harmed a lot

in 2014 i was the stuck for 2 years in a abusive relationship where I was physically and mentally abused for 2 years, I had to do a moonlight flit to get away and ran as fast as I could to my parents it was either that or death, that would of been the end result.

since moving back to my home town and with the support of parents and family I have turned my life around, I wont say I am fully recovered but I am on the way! I haven't had a "episode" for 2 years now and I am am in a much better place with a much better and positive outlook on life!

With great friends and family anything can be achived its just having the courage to stand up and say this is me!

I will continue to campaign for better mental health for everyone and will continue to take this fight daily!
 

The Tigress ♡

✮ You are worth it ✮
Chat Pro
#2
Great idea Jay*hug
  • How did it begin I guess it began ever since I was very young. Perhaps I didn't realised it because I was still very young. My parents have been very abusive to me from a very young age.
  • (I'm skipping the next two questions)
  • how quick did you find help Help for me is a very slow but gradual process.
  • do you feel your on the road to recovery Definitely. Things are getting better.
 

Jayjay289

Jay Jay from the UK
SF Pro
#3
Great idea Jay*hug
  • How did it begin I guess it began ever since I was very young. Perhaps I didn't realised it because I was still very young. My parents have been very abusive to me from a very young age.
  • (I'm skipping the next two questions)
  • how quick did you find help Help for me is a very slow but gradual process.
  • do you feel your on the road to recovery Definitely. Things are getting better.
glad to hear your getting better Tigress!!! keep up the faith
 

Butterfly

Sim Addict
Safety & Support
SF Author
SF Supporter
#5
I was 12 when I first started self harming. But I had extreme mood swings as a teenager which I think were the beginnings of my bipolar which started at age 13. I was sexually assaulted at 13 and was bullied because of my race (I was white and in the minority). I got myself into a lot of trouble. I moved towns when I was 15 but the bullying continued and I attempted suicide at 15 and was referred to CAMHS, discharged from them when I was 16. Managed for a few years then entered adult services at 20. I was assessed for bipolar initially but the pdoc said it was moderate depression but also commented it was NOT EUPD. I stayed under the CMHT and was finally diagnosed as BP at 24 and wasn't really well controlled. Hospitalised at 25, they tried to fob me off with EUPD but my CMHT disagreed but said I had BP2 with EUPD traits. I agreed because I do get traits when I'm severely depressed. Hospitalised again January 2019 after a severe psychotic depression, was in for 5 months, was sectioned 3 months later for a further 5 months where I received my Schizoaffective diagnosis at age 29. I'm 30 now and have been stable for around 5 months. Long may it continue!
 

Jayjay289

Jay Jay from the UK
SF Pro
#6
I was 12 when I first started self harming. But I had extreme mood swings as a teenager which I think were the beginnings of my bipolar which started at age 13. I was sexually assaulted at 13 and was bullied because of my race (I was white and in the minority). I got myself into a lot of trouble. I moved towns when I was 15 but the bullying continued and I attempted suicide at 15 and was referred to CAMHS, discharged from them when I was 16. Managed for a few years then entered adult services at 20. I was assessed for bipolar initially but the pdoc said it was moderate depression but also commented it was NOT EUPD. I stayed under the CMHT and was finally diagnosed as BP at 24 and wasn't really well controlled. Hospitalised at 25, they tried to fob me off with EUPD but my CMHT disagreed but said I had BP2 with EUPD traits. I agreed because I do get traits when I'm severely depressed. Hospitalised again January 2019 after a severe psychotic depression, was in for 5 months, was sectioned 3 months later for a further 5 months where I received my Schizoaffective diagnosis at age 29. I'm 30 now and have been stable for around 5 months. Long may it continue!
wow Butterfly, what a Journey you have had! I for one am glad that your still here and you have found yourself to now be stable! thats a great result! keep it going and utilise every bit of help you can get!
 

Legate Lanius

Well-Known Member
#7
So here is a question, what is your mental health story?
My story started in mid 90's when I started losing my head and started self harming, in 2002 I sought help from my GP as I knew something wasn't right and I was just put anti depressant's, no explanation no nothing then in mid 2000's i got a lot worse the self harming was out of control and my life was on a downward spiral, i was losing my self left right and centre, i went to see a doctor and got referred to a local Dr who then diagnosed me as being Bi-Polar, I was then put on hefty drugs that did more harm then good and I was way out of control and as a result I lost my marriage, my step kids, my home. in 2012 I pushed for a second opinion where i was then diagnosed as BPD and put on a new drug that really helped and helped me get a grip and control again of my life, sure i was still pretty sick and self harmed a lot

in 2014 i was the stuck for 2 years in a abusive relationship where I was physically and mentally abused for 2 years, I had to do a moonlight flit to get away and ran as fast as I could to my parents it was either that or death, that would of been the end result.

since moving back to my home town and with the support of parents and family I have turned my life around, I wont say I am fully recovered but I am on the way! I haven't had a "episode" for 2 years now and I am am in a much better place with a much better and positive outlook on life!

With great friends and family anything can be achived its just having the courage to stand up and say this is me!

I will continue to campaign for better mental health for everyone and will continue to take this fight daily!
Very nice to see you get through that.

Great idea Jay*hug
  • How did it begin I guess it began ever since I was very young. Perhaps I didn't realised it because I was still very young. My parents have been very abusive to me from a very young age.
  • how quick did you find help Help for me is a very slow but gradual process.
  • do you feel your on the road to recovery Definitely. Things are getting better.
Great to hear, fam.
I was 12 when I first started self harming. But I had extreme mood swings as a teenager which I think were the beginnings of my bipolar which started at age 13. I was sexually assaulted at 13 and was bullied because of my race (I was white and in the minority). I got myself into a lot of trouble. I moved towns when I was 15 but the bullying continued and I attempted suicide at 15 and was referred to CAMHS, discharged from them when I was 16. Managed for a few years then entered adult services at 20. I was assessed for bipolar initially but the pdoc said it was moderate depression but also commented it was NOT EUPD. I stayed under the CMHT and was finally diagnosed as BP at 24 and wasn't really well controlled. Hospitalised at 25, they tried to fob me off with EUPD but my CMHT disagreed but said I had BP2 with EUPD traits. I agreed because I do get traits when I'm severely depressed. Hospitalised again January 2019 after a severe psychotic depression, was in for 5 months, was sectioned 3 months later for a further 5 months where I received my Schizoaffective diagnosis at age 29. I'm 30 now and have been stable for around 5 months. Long may it continue!
Wow, I am always amazed at what people on here are able to get through, a strong bunch.

My stupid garbage:

Began when I was born (some traits of autism/ introversion, waiting for an official diagnosis now).
The trigger was puberty, getting crushes and so on.
I realized that I was in the small minority of everything when it came to basically everything, especially social stuff.
I have not received help yet, seeing the rapists has not worked, the meds did not work. But I am waiting on getting an official diagnosis (or not, I don't have that many traits of autism).
I don't think I can ever recover from this. I don't want a job, but I want money. I want my own place, but I don't want to be socially isolated. I want to cuddle with a girlfriend, but I don't want to have someone around a lot. I don't want to have friends. I only want to die but not so much that I feel the need to get it done right now. Idk, seems more existential/ personality wise than anything else. I just have low extroversion and high neuroticism and that's it, maybe.
 

Jayjay289

Jay Jay from the UK
SF Pro
#8
Very nice to see you get through that.


Great to hear, fam.

Wow, I am always amazed at what people on here are able to get through, a strong bunch.

My stupid garbage:

Began when I was born (some traits of autism/ introversion, waiting for an official diagnosis now).
The trigger was puberty, getting crushes and so on.
I realized that I was in the small minority of everything when it came to basically everything, especially social stuff.
I have not received help yet, seeing the rapists has not worked, the meds did not work. But I am waiting on getting an official diagnosis (or not, I don't have that many traits of autism).
I don't think I can ever recover from this. I don't want a job, but I want money. I want my own place, but I don't want to be socially isolated. I want to cuddle with a girlfriend, but I don't want to have someone around a lot. I don't want to have friends. I only want to die but not so much that I feel the need to get it done right now. Idk, seems more existential/ personality wise than anything else. I just have low extroversion and high neuroticism and that's it, maybe.
its never stupid garbage, its your feelings and how you feel, NEVER stupid
 

Gonz

sick and tired of being sick and tired
#9
How did it begin

Hard to say for sure, but I don't remember a time when it wasn't there. Honestly, I think it started as an infant, attachment disorder from being bounced around the foster system for the first few months of my life, or maybe earlier if you agree with the experts who've concluded that maternal stress during pregnancy can cause higher rates of mental illness for their children. My bio-mother certainly would have been stressed during her pregnancy with me, given the circumstances. The circumstances of my conception, birth, and first months of life were all shit, and it just snowballed from there.

Point is, it was there even in my earliest memories, even at 3 or 4 years. I had what is known as selective mutism today, and remember being seriously anxious, even then.

what was the trigger

I'd say that all the stuff above was the original cause, the start of my mental health issues. But the thing that kicked it all up a few notches, and solidified the anxiety as part of my personality, was abuse from an older family member that went on from age 4 to age 10 and one particularly violent incident when I was 8.

what did you realise

That I was fucked up, that I was mentally "weak," that people preyed on weakness and, most of all, that I needed to hide everything that was wrong with me.

how quick did you find help

Well, I'm not sure I ever actually found any actual help even up until now. But my folks had me in therapy off and on starting when I was 11.

do you feel your on the road to recovery

I'm not 100% sure recovery is even a possibility for some people, myself included.
 

Witty⭐️Sarcasm ⭐️

§ Eclectic nutbag ©
SF Supporter
#10
  • How did it begin? I became depressed when I was around 8 years old, and suicidal around 13.
  • what was the trigger? The loss of important people in my life, family dysfunction, bullying
  • what did you realise? That I had a lot of problems.
  • how quick did you find help? Not fast at all, not until I was 30 at any rate.
  • do you feel your on the road to recovery? I think so, because therapy and meds have helped.
 

Nick

☆☆Still Ducking Fantastic ☆☆
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#11
How did it begin?
I'm not sure you can put a date stamp on that. Some things were always there, others were made worse or possibly brought on by life circumstances. I've been diagnosed with depression, BPD, social anxiety, generalized anxiety PTSD and autism. Some of those overlap, and it becomes a question of what came first and what belongs where?

what was the trigger?
I grew up in an aggressively abusive environment. I also have a narcissistic parent. I learned at a very early age what monsters look like.

what did you realise?
I did not have the support of family. Nobody was going to protect me. Life is not safe. I am not worth much.

how quick did you find help?
My first suicide attempt was at 13, but my narcissistic parent managed to smooth that over and I did not receive any help at that time. I first attempted to get help in early adulthood, but it quickly became clear that neither myself nor the professional were prepared for the labyrinth that is me. After multiple medications and therapy disasters, we gave up. I continued my freefall with the aid of self medication because I could not face the past or the future. It wasn't until the last few years I really truly gave it another shot.

do you feel your on the road to recovery?
I don't know I'll ever fully "recover" in the sense that it will all subside. I'm in a much better place than I was a couple years ago. I'm even in a better place than a few months ago. I'll take the small victories and call it a win. The idea that I will ever fully arrive in this life doesn't seem plausible.
 

Jayjay289

Jay Jay from the UK
SF Pro
#13
How did it begin

Hard to say for sure, but I don't remember a time when it wasn't there. Honestly, I think it started as an infant, attachment disorder from being bounced around the foster system for the first few months of my life, or maybe earlier if you agree with the experts who've concluded that maternal stress during pregnancy can cause higher rates of mental illness for their children. My bio-mother certainly would have been stressed during her pregnancy with me, given the circumstances. The circumstances of my conception, birth, and first months of life were all shit, and it just snowballed from there.

Point is, it was there even in my earliest memories, even at 3 or 4 years. I had what is known as selective mutism today, and remember being seriously anxious, even then.

what was the trigger

I'd say that all the stuff above was the original cause, the start of my mental health issues. But the thing that kicked it all up a few notches, and solidified the anxiety as part of my personality, was abuse from an older family member that went on from age 4 to age 10 and one particularly violent incident when I was 8.

what did you realise

That I was fucked up, that I was mentally "weak," that people preyed on weakness and, most of all, that I needed to hide everything that was wrong with me.

how quick did you find help

Well, I'm not sure I ever actually found any actual help even up until now. But my folks had me in therapy off and on starting when I was 11.

do you feel your on the road to recovery

I'm not 100% sure recovery is even a possibility for some people, myself included.
 

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