I was thinking of wearing sleeveless when my periods would start , but I won't anymore because it's not safe.
My so called mom's side relatives came. Her aunt , two of their children , the aunt's sister , the sister's daughter in law and her daughter. Mhm. So , the daughter in law and her daughter live in states. The aunt's daughter ( like two of their children as in she came with her two daughters ) , her hair was open. And because we have been to their house before , they seem chill to me ( atleast on your face ).
The information about their arrival was like last minute, they were in the town so came.
At home , I was just wearing Indian clothes but my shirt ( you can call it that , basically top ) was torn off. I still wore it , but so called mom said to not wear it again so I was like yeah , okay , I guess. Islam has objections about this too lol.
But , when the information came , so called mom asked me to change into PJ's quickly ( little fitted t - shirt and pajama pants , my hips and thighs can look a bit defined in them ) , she said that girls can wear it at home , it will be alright.
So , I changed. Everything's cool , I sat on a cot / bedstead outside the room ( cause the room would be occupied ). My so called uncle woke at the same time , irritated, asked me in a rude , threatening tone " what was I doing outside there ? Why are you sitting there ? "
" Just because "
" Why are you wearing these clothes ? Don't you know guests would be coming soon ; * go change the clothes * in an intense , abusive , rude , threatening tone * "
I slowly gathered my stuff , went inside the room. As , I was gathering stuff , so called aunt came and was like " why are you sitting here in such a heat " in condescending tone. Told you before , they like to make the fire big , it's like they wanna support abuse and then act like a saviour or manipulate , whatever.
"It " asked my mom , she was at call , at door somewhere. So , when she came back - " what is she wearing ? Why did you make her wear this? Can't you see ? Have you lost your brain ? "
Couldn't hear what she replied.
I heard him though " I will spin rods " which is basically kind of literal translation in English but " it " meant that " it " would hit me and her and probably everyone who would support this with rods , not just one hit , numerous of them.
I went inside the closet so I could stay hidden and abuse could die down and perhaps so I could change too if needed.
The guests were inside the room after seconds of that , I came outside , greeted them.
Didn't change , so called mom didn't say anything wrong about my clothes during or after.
During conversations with them though , I kept zoning out , I was anxious , traumatised.
Good news - Hopefully " it " would be away from home and is leaving for a city for few days tomorrow. For party , I would be able to open my hair and wear what I had planned ( styling etc ) I hope my mom would just not say anything , but we briefly had a talk so hopefully all will went okay.
It's been months now that I have acknowledged , no matter how much I hate my so called aunt and mom , their wrongs can never be justified. I may forgive , that's different. But they did wrong , are doing wrong , will do wrong. The truth is , they belong to the oppressive class. The penises are the oppressors.
I hope my relationship with my so called mom could improve someday.
My so called mom's side relatives came. Her aunt , two of their children , the aunt's sister , the sister's daughter in law and her daughter. Mhm. So , the daughter in law and her daughter live in states. The aunt's daughter ( like two of their children as in she came with her two daughters ) , her hair was open. And because we have been to their house before , they seem chill to me ( atleast on your face ).
The information about their arrival was like last minute, they were in the town so came.
At home , I was just wearing Indian clothes but my shirt ( you can call it that , basically top ) was torn off. I still wore it , but so called mom said to not wear it again so I was like yeah , okay , I guess. Islam has objections about this too lol.
But , when the information came , so called mom asked me to change into PJ's quickly ( little fitted t - shirt and pajama pants , my hips and thighs can look a bit defined in them ) , she said that girls can wear it at home , it will be alright.
So , I changed. Everything's cool , I sat on a cot / bedstead outside the room ( cause the room would be occupied ). My so called uncle woke at the same time , irritated, asked me in a rude , threatening tone " what was I doing outside there ? Why are you sitting there ? "
" Just because "
" Why are you wearing these clothes ? Don't you know guests would be coming soon ; * go change the clothes * in an intense , abusive , rude , threatening tone * "
I slowly gathered my stuff , went inside the room. As , I was gathering stuff , so called aunt came and was like " why are you sitting here in such a heat " in condescending tone. Told you before , they like to make the fire big , it's like they wanna support abuse and then act like a saviour or manipulate , whatever.
"It " asked my mom , she was at call , at door somewhere. So , when she came back - " what is she wearing ? Why did you make her wear this? Can't you see ? Have you lost your brain ? "
Couldn't hear what she replied.
I heard him though " I will spin rods " which is basically kind of literal translation in English but " it " meant that " it " would hit me and her and probably everyone who would support this with rods , not just one hit , numerous of them.
I went inside the closet so I could stay hidden and abuse could die down and perhaps so I could change too if needed.
The guests were inside the room after seconds of that , I came outside , greeted them.
Didn't change , so called mom didn't say anything wrong about my clothes during or after.
During conversations with them though , I kept zoning out , I was anxious , traumatised.
Good news - Hopefully " it " would be away from home and is leaving for a city for few days tomorrow. For party , I would be able to open my hair and wear what I had planned ( styling etc ) I hope my mom would just not say anything , but we briefly had a talk so hopefully all will went okay.
It's been months now that I have acknowledged , no matter how much I hate my so called aunt and mom , their wrongs can never be justified. I may forgive , that's different. But they did wrong , are doing wrong , will do wrong. The truth is , they belong to the oppressive class. The penises are the oppressors.
I hope my relationship with my so called mom could improve someday.