(TRIGGER, be cautious) Confused...

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Ahmandah, Feb 21, 2013.

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  1. Ahmandah

    Ahmandah Member

    So I jus found out I am classified as anorexic because I am underweight yet still get my menses. I am 5'7" and 106lbs. Damn. I still feel kinda proud about it but I know that I need to change this. Anyways. Here's the confusing part. I am hungry. Like, hunger pains, feel nauseous... Hungry. I want to eat, but I know I need to. And when I do eat, I feel like I can't eat enough which frustrates me and sets me back even further... I stupidly fear being fat. And to me, I cannot allow myself to get more than 128 pounds at the heaviest... Which is the heaviest I have ever been. I felt so gross... I jus don't know how to ease into gaining weight while still getting nutrients I need... It doesn't help that I am a picky eater either... If you have any ideas, then go ahead and post...
  2. SadBk

    SadBk Well-Known Member

    I don't really have any advice but wanted to say I read your post and I can relate.
    I'm not anorexic...but I'm 5'7" and 108 pounds. My goal is 100, with 104 as the max. Skinny enough that people are envious but not over-the-top skeletal. I'm losing very slowly.
    I don't want to gain any weight back. My highest was 145. That's on the chunky side of normal BMI for our height. Sounds so fat, doesn't it?
    I have fantasies about eating like a normal person sometimes... but I can't if I want to stay at this weight :\
  3. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Not sure if the BMI's verdict of chunky at 145lbs is accurate, though I am willing to be proved wrong. I struggle to stay in the normal range of BMI at 68kg and am the same height - if I hit 70kg (154lbs) that's when BMI says I'm overweight. I think BMI is way too depressing for those who want it to tell them they are normal.

    I'd suggest making a list of the foods you really like the taste of and that have great nutrients in them, and then slowly increase your helpings - this will give you the confidence you're doing your best for your body and then your mind will start letting you out of this food prison :)
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hiyas, when I was 18, I was 5'7 and 84lbs. Now I am 24 and tbh I am ashamed to say my weight(I have gained a lot of weight due to my 'addiction' to coca cola' lol and taking medications that gain weight). I was never anorexic..my problem was anxiety was causing the weight loss and severe nausea. My tip to you would be to see a nutritionist, to ensure you're getting all the nutrients your body needs and doing it safely too because when I was severely underweight I developed anemia and although it didn't take long to cure, it just shows you that you may not be as healthy as you think you are-its very early in the morning for me and I have not slept well so I hope my post has made some sense lol.
  5. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    I agree with CocaCola. to see a nutritionist ........who knows how to work with people who have EDs. Because a regular nutritionist would not understand how to help. The thing about EDs is that the person who has the ED thinks they are in charge of things. But its a very slipperly slope. At a certain point, the ED takes charge. And the person doesnt even realize it. So please be very careful about it all. i thought I was in charge. I thought I could get away with it. The fear of food. The love of the quest. The feeling of control over it all. But in the end, it stole my health. I do not want to see that happen to other people. It also has happened to people who I love very much.
  6. Ahmandah

    Ahmandah Member

    An update for everyone:
    I've never missed my menses except for when I was pregnant. I know I am not now. And I know I've been eating alot less due to all of the stress I'm in... And I'm so disappointed with myself because my missing it, is because I'm hardly eating at all... I have no idea how much I weigh right now but I'd be surprised if it was over 105lbs. I'm so mad at myself right now, but I thought I should let everyone know that I failed...
  7. SadBk

    SadBk Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you're feeling so crummy, Ahmandah *hugs* What do you think you've failed? Getting better or getting worse?

    Do you feel like you need to hit some kind of bottom before you can climb back up? That's how I feel. But that can be dangerous :\
  8. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    According to the bmi calculator your BMI is 16.6 which is very low and you certainly need to speak to your GP/MD and get a referral to EDU/EDS and be closely monitored it must be so tough on you.
  9. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I think focusing on weight with an ED may not consider all of the concerning issues...for me, I am prone to ED now under the most stressful times, as I 'forget' to eat...much of ED is about asserting 'control' (for lack of a better word) over one's issues, which, once I was able to do, I was able to start to eat more normally...for me, I have to eat 5 small meals as a lot of food feels very uncomfortable, even to this day...I worked with a nutritionist and a pdoc for a year to start back on the right road.
  10. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    Yes but your closely momitored they can be aware of your weight changes drastically or if you admit to them your restricting and relapsing again given your medical history of anorexia.
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