Hey Claus. I think what a lot of people are trying to highlight by describing how they relate to your experience is that they can see the unrealistic way you view yourself, because it's so similar to the way they viewed themselves. And it's so blatant in the way you describe yourself, because if you were viewing yourself objectively and fairly, you would be able to see some positive and value in yourself no matter how much of the negative was fact. You could pick literally the worst people from human history and find a few good things you could say about them, so to be as bad as you claim, you would have to make dictators, serial killers, cannibals, etc, all look better by comparison. And you'd have to be pretty exceptionally awful to have done that. Hence, the way you perceive yourself comes across as deeply self-loathing and biased, which is a classic sign of depressed thinking, which is why people keep bringing up depression.
As for therapy, the way it's work is that yes, it is technically just talking, but it's talking that requires you to take a real look at yourself, without any illusions or delusions, to wipe away all the layers of insecurities, doubt, and self-hatred. To see the real person hiding underneath all that crap. To work through the intricate spider's web of damage, negative thought patterns, and biased thinking that form your issues, and in the end to understand the paths your mind takes, how it gets to its conclusions, and how to stop letting it go down bad roads. It can take years to untangle that messy ball of neuroses, misaligned beliefs and poor self-images, and make it organised and tidy again, especially since it will constantly attempt to untidy itself. And that increase in feeling depressed is often part of the process in the early days. Because pushing through that sadness and continuing to work on it is how you reach the core of your problems, and become stronger and better for it. Because that sadness, is the work.
You argue you're a lost cause, but to us, you sound so familiar, because you sound just like us. Every person that has come here has believed they are a lost cause at some point or another, but has gradually changed over time into these optimistic, painfully cheerful people you see trying to defend you. They all saw that they had more value than they realised, and they earnestly believe that you do too, you just aren't at the point where you can see it yet.
As for therapy, the way it's work is that yes, it is technically just talking, but it's talking that requires you to take a real look at yourself, without any illusions or delusions, to wipe away all the layers of insecurities, doubt, and self-hatred. To see the real person hiding underneath all that crap. To work through the intricate spider's web of damage, negative thought patterns, and biased thinking that form your issues, and in the end to understand the paths your mind takes, how it gets to its conclusions, and how to stop letting it go down bad roads. It can take years to untangle that messy ball of neuroses, misaligned beliefs and poor self-images, and make it organised and tidy again, especially since it will constantly attempt to untidy itself. And that increase in feeling depressed is often part of the process in the early days. Because pushing through that sadness and continuing to work on it is how you reach the core of your problems, and become stronger and better for it. Because that sadness, is the work.
You argue you're a lost cause, but to us, you sound so familiar, because you sound just like us. Every person that has come here has believed they are a lost cause at some point or another, but has gradually changed over time into these optimistic, painfully cheerful people you see trying to defend you. They all saw that they had more value than they realised, and they earnestly believe that you do too, you just aren't at the point where you can see it yet.
Here we go:
