well here i am

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by sbm1990, Mar 28, 2015.

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  1. sbm1990

    sbm1990 New Member

    Hello, my name is scott, im 25 years old, i used to have a job working as a courier for fedex, but a few months ago, i was arrested for a DUI because of some douche cop found weed in my car and decided not to cut me a break. A few months later, fedex found out about it and fired me as a result.

    Lately, i just feel like i have no reason to live in this world anymore, and the only reason i havent offed myself yet is because i wouldnt want to put my immediate family through the pain of me taking my own life. But even so, i just feel like im drifting through this world with absolutely no purpose, i screw up everything i do. I feel like ill never amount to anything in this life, and i just wonder what would happen if i just disappeared and never returned. I dont have many good friends to turn to, and most of the friends i do have, i feel would be burdened if i told them how depressed ive been feeling lately, and my motivation to be productive is being sucked dry by fatigue and depression.

    Its like, this society expects you to look and act a certain way and then judges you negatively if you dont live up to those expectations, and ive always felt like an outcast, like nobody wants me around, ivr been contemplating suicide alot lately as my will to live in this world is slowly being sucked away day by day, i just feel like i have nothing in this world to look forward to anymore.
  2. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum. I understand where you are coming from. Each day you face is hard but I must stress whatever crisis you go through its important to stay alive. I understand the situations are not helping but you can get through them. You need to appreciate life by coping on a hour by hour basis.

    You need to speak to your doctor and get some medication which will help you. We all suffer here in one way or another, so we understand what you are going through. You will get over this bad in your life but you have done nothing wrong like others do each day. Please do not think about doing anything as you are important and we can get you through this tough period of your life. Just think, like I say to others, someone somewhere does care about you and please keep thinking that.

    Keep posting as everyone will be supportive for you on this forum. Be safe please.
  3. JmpMster

    JmpMster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I am glad you found us here. It is easy to get very depressed and much harder to find a way out of it by yourself. Talking with other people that understand it is helpful for many here. Sometimes, real help such as counseling or meds is helpful to get things turned around so you can find the motivation to take the next step. When a difficult situation like you are in where things got bad really suddenly hits, it is too easy to let it control our lives. I hope you don't let it control yours and make it simply a small blip and part of you past as it should be with no real bearing on your future.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hello Scott and welcome to the forum. Really sorry to hear what you are going through. Are you finding it difficult to get another job? I do agree that society expects us to be a certain way but you have to rise above that and be yourself, be who you want to be and don't change for anyone. Everyone is unique.

    Feel free to keep talking to us here Scott.
  5. sbm1990

    sbm1990 New Member

    Well, i dont have health insurance or a job for that matter, so a counselor/thearpist wouldnt do me much good. I applied to two jobs today, hopefully, ill hear back from either place. I just sometimes feel like what i want to do with my life wont ever happen, because of my lack of charisma, confidence, or social skills in general. I want help but i dont know where to turn.
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