What am I supposed to do?

[Unregistered12345]

I used to have a close friendship until the end of last year. That person abandoned me in my time of need. I don't miss that person at all (why would I?), but I do miss having that close friendship. She was the only one I had, and now I don't know how I'm supposed to live happily and be positive. She was, unfortunately, the only person interested in being my friend. (Amazing, huh, when she leaves me hanging in the end?) What now? I'm a shy person, I tried finding people online, especially in my city, and I HAVE NO LUCK. It feels like I'm in the group in the world that has no justice.

 

[Jenny]

Hi there,

I'm sorry that this friend has treated you in this way and left you. People can be very cruel sometimes, often without realising the knock-on effect they have on others.

I'm glad that you have found this website and posted here though. There are lots of lovely people on this forum.. maybe you could give us a go? If you'd like to become a member, or if you're already one, please drop me a PM if you want.. There's also the 'Buddy Chat' forum where you can request to have 'buddies' to talk to.

It may not be quite the same as having a friend 'in real life' but we are real people and we do care.

Hope to hear more from you soon
:hug:
Jenny x

 

[resistance]

I can relate, it really hurts when something like that happens and leaves you feeling more alone than ever. You say no one else has interest in being your friend, but is this really true? I mean, likelihood is your shyness is getting in the way and people do want to be friends with you, why wouldn't they want to be friends with you?

It can be hard making new friends and socialising, have you tried joining any interest groups in your area? If you join a group you are interested in, then other peoples will be interested in that area too and is a good basis to start talking and friendships are made.

Small-talk is a good start. Maybe when you go to the local shops or when you're waiting at the bus stop or something and you're around someone make a comment about the weather and that can lead onto other things.

I hope things work out, I'm sure they will just hang in there. :hug:

 

[letdown]

Hello unregistered,

Unfortunately I've had this happen time and time again. I too have very few people wanting to be my friend..

That feeling of being abandoned is tears you apart especially when at times of need.

I echo the posts above about reaching out here as much as you can. I know that is no substitute for a close friendship but it can help to some extent..

:hug:

 

[Unregistered12345]

Thank you, all of you, for taking the time to read my post and for replying. You certainly do understand how it hurts like hell. I've tried reaching out, as my "friend" suggested. Unfortunately, it didn't work out for me. I don't miss her at all; I hate her for betraying me. However, I do miss having that close friendship, and not having it any more is truly painful. I don't know... I feel very defeated.

 

[letdown]

Did your attempt to reach out, and the friend you are talking about- were they in "real life" or the internet?

You sound so much like me it's...slightly comforting I suppose.

:hug: I'm sorry you're hurting so much. It does ease after a while. I start building up walls and say "never again," but it always happens again and again. It is defeating and demoralising.

 

[Unregistered12345]

She was a real life friend. We went to college together. That's also when I made my attempts.