Why cant i do it?!?

[NothingToWorryAbout]

why the hell everytime i plan on killing myself i always change my mind at the last second?? i went into town centre today where theres a huge building which u can get access to the roof, i walked there and actually climbed to the top and i sat there freezing my vegetables off, and i decided not to do it..WHY?!? this is not the 1st or even 2nd time ive stopped at the last second and changed my mind im so fucking useless i cant even jump off a building and kill myself.

1 day i will find a way of not being able to stop myself from doing it and end up dead. 1 day!

 

[ToHelp]

Had better be one tall building NTA. You do it and screw that one, you can experience never-before levels of agony. But WHY? Well. Look inside. If it's not fear that's holding you back then it could be something spiritual and purposeful.

Don't dismiss this post. Ponder and deliberate. You gotta be "good for" something, shit you could.... wash windows on tall buildings! Betcha there's good pay there.

 

[Petal]

:hug: Here if you need to talk.

 

[LenaLunacy]

I am glad you can't do it. Am sorry things are so bad that you feel death is the only solution. But it really isn't. Am always around if you need an ear. :hug:

 

[Sadeyes]

Maybe it is about getting out of the pain, not ending your life...and you are instead being very brave staying and seeing what is getting you to this point...not every time it is said that we want to end it, is it a literal desire, but instead, a cry that we are in dire agony...wishing you much easier times and please find comfort in communicating with the many ppl here who understand...big hugs, J

 

[crookxshanks]

ive done this many a time and found that i cannot conquer my fear of heights by my desperate need to die

the fact that you find it so hard to actually go through with it must mean something else is pulling you back as it were. that theres something in your life that is still worth living for.

pm me if you ever need to talk :hug:

 

[~Serendipity~]

You cant do it because deep down inside of you, you are not ready to die !! It is NOT failure in any way shape or form so please dont confuse yourself with all of that. Obviously there is something that is worth living for ... be true to yourself and stop giving yourself such a hard time, take things slowly and allow yourself the time to heal and for whatever reasons you have that have led you to this point whether it be from your own choices or from what others have done dont let the bad engulf you, YOU have chosen to live even if you were not aware of it at the time !!! and YOU can get through this !!! What doesnt kill ya makes you stronger ... your inner self is stronger than you give yourself credit for !!!

 

[ToHelp]

^ Surrender not; for tis the death of those who do.

Take in my signature. Defiance can mean salvation.

 

[ToHelp]

the fact that you find it so hard to actually go through with it must mean something else is pulling you back as it were. that theres something in your life that is still worth living for.

Further still, one would hope that we are each here born of a higher calling with roles yet to fulfill.

ToHelp

 

[camerondavid]

Well, I can't tell you why you aren't able to jump. But, I can say that I'm glad you're unable to. Maybe your body is smarter than your mind is. One wants to jump, and the other is refusing. =]