Why not change sf to datingsite?

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boo

Well-Known Member
#1
this is just a rent, so dont get goodie on me.

I appreciate SF for what it is. I dont expect much from it. But for a site about suicide, i'll say it feels more like a dating service site.
Whenever i go to chat i get ignore most of the time when i try to have a serious convo. Sometime i even get shut down.
Rarely anyone greets me, only girls with cute fancy tag name get that treatments in chat. Now dont get me wrong, there are genuine people in need, but 80% of the time is people talking about what shoes they want to wear or they need advice on dating tips... Perhaps make a "flirt room" so i dont have to deal with all the happy stuff. It just makes me even more depressed.
peace out
 

itmahanh

Senior Member & Antiquities Friend
#2
Tried it as a dating site, that didnt go to well. As for chat it's there for good times. There was a time in a galaxy far far away that chat was a place to go for support,advice and fun. Yes all 3 could be managed quite nicely. But it isnt anymore. So if you are looking for serious convo you might need to set up a seperate room hun. But dont be surprised to find yourself in there all alone. It's the nature of chat. Feel free to drop a pm whenever you need someone to listen. May not be on the same time as you but will always reply, seriously.
 

boo

Well-Known Member
#4
I know alot of you greets me, maybe its just me feeling more down. I'm a messed sorry. And thank you dum dum :P
 
#5
I never go into chat because I never really have anything to say. Everytime I have visited it's just purely for chit-chat and small talk rather than about serious issues like on the forum, and I think that's fine, there should be somewhere where you can just be 'normal' away from all the suicide talk, but then again sometimes when you need support immediately you seldom get that in chat.

Maybe there should be another chat room set up somewhere.
We could even call it 'The Emergency Room' or something, where you only go in there if you really are having a bad day, needing help and support and to talk right now instead of just idle chit chat. But have it away from the regular chat room.
 

Tam

Well-Known Member
#6
I thought there were other rooms in chat - like triggering subjects and quiet room (though I've never been in those). Are they also not used for more serious chatting?
 

elleanne

Well-Known Member
#7
I have`nt had the pleasure of the chat room. (I can imagine).
This forum has it`s good points...if platitudes typed by someone who does`nt know you, and who blindly goes with all the `poor you` stuff is what you want. To some miserable people, someone else typing sweet nothings is just what they want.
Some of us (ie me) don`t want any of that, but once this forum is signed up to, it`s a life sentance with no chance of parole....we`re not even `allowed` to leave, because we may be isolating ourselves (hello-how isolating is it to encourage dependancy on a forum like this?).
I suggest you phone / email samaritans/some other `listening service` if you want more individualised sympathy.
I know none of this is of any ues to you, probably - it`s the truth as I see it though.
 
#8
I have`nt had the pleasure of the chat room. (I can imagine).
This forum has it`s good points...if platitudes typed by someone who does`nt know you, and who blindly goes with all the `poor you` stuff is what you want. To some miserable people, someone else typing sweet nothings is just what they want.
Some of us (ie me) don`t want any of that, but once this forum is signed up to, it`s a life sentance with no chance of parole....we`re not even `allowed` to leave, because we may be isolating ourselves (hello-how isolating is it to encourage dependancy on a forum like this?).
I suggest you phone / email samaritans/some other `listening service` if you want more individualised sympathy.
I know none of this is of any ues to you, probably - it`s the truth as I see it though.

How is this forum a life sentence?

I also think the word sympathy is patronising. People come here for empathy not sympathy.
 

elleanne

Well-Known Member
#9
How is it a life sentance? Because we can choose to become members, but not to leave.

I have read several threads where people have specifically asked for sympathy. I never stated that all members want it all of the time, but some do.

report my post (please)- i want my account to be closed.
 

IDKwhatIwant

Well-Known Member
#11
i dont know about dating. its nice sometimes that they dont always talk about depressing things. gets my mind off of it, but they normally talk about silly stuff like karate or shoes.

i think ive had maybe one serious discussion in chat...
 

NoGood

Well-Known Member
#12
I have to agree with the OP, the chatroom isnt the nicest place to be. I always enter with an open mind as to what topics are being discussed and i always greet everyone when i enter but i never get a reply from the people in there, they chose to ignore that you have said hello and then when someone they know comes in they are quick to welcome them. Ive attempted to have conversations there. I say hi then get ignored, so then i ask hows everyone is and get ignored then i try to join in with their topic of discussion and get ignored so i dont bother going in there anymore even though it is a feature i would like to use.

But i understand that the chatroom is a hard room to monitor.

At least i think the forum is good :) (just between me and you, all the best people use the forum anyway not the chatroom ;) )
 

happyville

Well-Known Member
#13
I actually had a nice welcome the first time I ever went into chat. Yes, people greeted people they knew more enthusiastically but... well, of course they would. That's just normal.

I like the chat being less serious, it's a nice place to get to know the other members, but there's the 'triggering' chat where serious stuff is discussed. And I was there for some serious stuff. :\
 

closertolove

Well-Known Member
#14
i know im in the chat a good bit, and i probably talk about a lot of fluffy stuff; for me, i find the chat lobby a nice place to talk about a lot of the seemingly "frivolous" things that are i just need to get off my chest. sometimes i want to obsess over that cute guy i like because i need some way to get him off my mind. sometimes i like to discuss shoes and hair, because it's a nice distraction from my crumbling family life or anything else thats going wrong

for me, it makes me feel better knowing that there's someone else in a situation like me happy enough to have that frivolous conversation. it makes me feel like i'm somewhat normally happy
 

Mikeintx

Well-Known Member
#15
Yes, I can see how you could see chat as being overly flirty. Hell I flirt with everyone, even the dudes(I find it funny but that is just me). I also am no longer depressed or suicide so I really like just chatting with friends and in general try to have a good time. If you are down, make it known so if someone else is feeling up to talking they know.
 
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