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Wish my brother found sf

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Sarah, Jan 21, 2015.

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  1. Sarah

    Sarah SF Friend & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    When I found sf many years ago it saved my life. I wish my brother had the same opportunity. Maybe he would have talked on here. He was always the strong one. He was the one I went to. The one that fixed it all. All my worries all my issues all I had to do was tell him and he fixed whatever it was.

    I told him about sf all those years ago. Wish I got the chance to tell him again . My rock is gone. I sooo just want to bring him back so I can fix it for him whatever it was.

    I wish he found sf. Wish he had a chance to tell someone. To talk to anyone.

    Instead his 15 year old son found him.

    I don't know how to fix this. It's unreal. Why couldn't I help him. Why didn't he think he could talk to me. He knew I used to be on here and knew I would understand!!!

    How could he do this to his son. How could he not know his son would be the one to find him? How could he do that to him????

    I know his depression blinded him to that reality and made him think there was no other choice. I know that in my head. But my heart is broken it doesn't understand.

    If only someone could have reminded him what he was thinking wasn't true. If only I could have told him how depression blinds us all to the truth.

    I'm so worried. How can I help his son. How do I fix this???

    Nothing is real right now the world is flipped upside down and inside out none of it makes sense.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi Sarah, it's nice to see you here sorry for the unfortunate circumstances though.. I am so sorry for your loss Sarah, I cannot imagine how incredibly hard it must be for you right now. But you do not have to walk this walk alone. We are here,we understand and we care. There are so many unanswered questions, you must be blue with grief. So many questions and so little answers. I am so sorry for your huge loss and I am here if you need someone. Try and get his son counselling, he will probably need it long term, build it in slowly into his life, he must be in real shock right now, I cannot imagine how difficult it is for him or you. If there is anything I can do to help, please PM me.

    May your brother rest in peace.
  3. smwhorses

    smwhorses Well-Known Member


    You can't fix what happened. You just need to figure out how to live with it and help your nephew. I am sure your brother did not want to cause everyone pain. He must have been suffering too much to think about everyone else.

    I am so sorry for the pain you are having.
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Who knows what triggered your brother it could have been an impulse decision not something he wanted just dam pain took him away
    Now his son will need professional help to deal with the trauma of finding his father and also to help him grieve the loss of his father
    I do hope both YOU and his son will get professional help

    He did not want to harm anyone no one could have know what he was feeling in that moment what pushed him over
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