Yeah, I qualify for this thread

Discussion in 'Life Changing or Long Term Physical Illness (New)' started by moxman, Oct 10, 2016.

  1. moxman

    moxman Rosie is a wonderful woman, and an awesome person. Forum Pro

    Mental Health Disorders
    Major Depressive Disorder
    Generalized Anxiety Disorder

    Physical Health Conditions
    No Colon
    Shoulder Arthritis *2
    Stomach Hernias
    History of Seizures


    15 Medications

    The Navy, totally failed me in my medical treatment for Colitis. The ship doctor was giving me vitamins, to treat colitis. Yes, vitamins. I feel like I should have been taken off of my ship.Sent to the States, to see a GI doctor. I am very angry about this, I don't know how to deal with it.

    Medication for Colitis, Azfuldean, caused me to have seizures. I had a seizure, and landed on my shoulder and messed it up pretty good.

    Had Colon removed to treat rampart Colitis. It was killing me. Now, I have perm. diarrhea, which is it's own personal "joy".

    Yeah, I have my plate full. I am so tired of it all. I am tired of being sick, and no hope that things will ever get better. Things will only get worse. I just want it all to stop. At 42, no hope for dating or imitancy , why keep living? What's the point of it?
    Last edited: Oct 10, 2016
  2. SillyOldBear

    SillyOldBear Teddy Bear Fanatic Staff Member Safety & Support

    Mox, didn't you say something about having a beautiful daughter. That sounds like a pretty good reason to stay on this earth.
    I understand about the colon problem. I have IBS, diverticulosis, bleeding hemrhoids (never will be able to spell that word), and colon isn't even where it should be anymore. Was pulled out of place by surgical adhesions caused by a lousy doctor. I never let myself get far from a bathroom and keep extra clothes available all the time. Have arthritis too. And dry eye, asthma, allergies, GAD, depression, GERD, floaters and flashers in my eyes....more stuff then I can list. It really does get brutal. And sometime I may decide to end things. But I want to be absolutely sure the time is right before I do that. One thing that I don't have, that you do, is that beautiful daughter. I hope you can find the strength to stay here for her.
    Hugs to both you and your daughter.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  3. moxman

    moxman Rosie is a wonderful woman, and an awesome person. Forum Pro

    I do and I love her to death, posted a thread today about her in Jims Cafe. Who is Jim anyway?

    I just don't know how much longer I can keep up.

    My life is so ridiculously stressed, I don't know how to handle it anymore.

    She's the one reason I am still here.
  4. SillyOldBear

    SillyOldBear Teddy Bear Fanatic Staff Member Safety & Support

    Jim was a moderator here a while back. He always posted in the cafe. He passed away suddenly due to natural causes so we renamed the cafe after him. He really was a wonderful man. I had the chance to meet him once in person. I shall always remember him fondly.
    Frances M, moxman and Heath2016 like this.
  5. moxman

    moxman Rosie is a wonderful woman, and an awesome person. Forum Pro

    It may sound weird, but I consider my stuttering to being the biggest obstacle I have. I can't apply for jobs requiring good telephone skills. It hinders me socially, because I am so self conscious about it. Makes it harder for me to reach out to other people/organizations for help. I really feel like I can't talk, and it is extremely frustrating for me. Don't even get me started on the nightmare of job interviews , and stuttering. That is part of why I feel so accepted by this place, I don't have to talk. I can just type. In college I had to watch videotape of myself giving presentations, I was so embarrassed by it, I felt like a "stuttering jack-ass"
  6. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Moxman *big hugs* I'm sorry you are going through so much. I just googled stuttering since that seems to be highest on your list right now. I googled "stuttering, causes, treatments". It seems there is "some" help out there - I don't know enough about the whole issue to gauge if would be worthwhile. Perhaps you could do a google search yourself and see if anything might be a good fit for you? One thing that really stuck out to me is that the skills that help stutterers need to be practised on a regular everyday basis so the person doesn't lose the skills. I suppose that makes sense in the way that a person with a weak ankle must continue to build and then maintain the muscle strength of that ankle.

    I'm glad you're here and able to share easily and get support. Take care of yourself! :)
    moxman likes this.
  7. Abhay

    Abhay Member

    Mox it's Abhay yeasterday I was on the brink of <mod edit - method> when I found this site, your comment made me <mod edit - details> I owe it to you to tell you that you where the first person that was nice to me after a long time, so to me you are a saint always remember that.
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 13, 2016
    DrownedFishOnFire and moxman like this.
  8. moxman

    moxman Rosie is a wonderful woman, and an awesome person. Forum Pro

    we can always chat ok
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 13, 2016
  9. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Hi Mox:

    Life sure is funny reminding ourselves that we are not immortal. People sure take their health for granted til its gone in a blink. Sorry about your health, I don't have a stutter issue but I do know how communication is a huge issue as I have barriers myself being deaf and unable to talk for myself most of the times as I rely on sign language. Talk about akward (wink)